In need of some serious advice, i 25(M) have been living with gf 23(f) for about 3 years i am her first love first kiss ect. she comes from a abusive family and is a only child, after 2 months of dating i felt really really bad as her dad was stealing her money and a bunch of other stuff so i told her to move in. after 1 year of dating i tried to break it off, she never cooked or helped clean, and when she did she’ll make it known and needs praise and then because of a huge gap in salaries suddenly she finally just stopped completely doing anything,when i tried to break up with her she begged, cried and basically screamed and scared me to the point of giving her another chance.
After a few months everything went back to normal and i was the designated adult again, i came to terms with my living situation, basically just closing my eyes and biting my tongue and having a nice household income..(skip 2 years later) about 7 weeks ago i lost my job, and this to her was the best thing ever, calling me house husband ect..she has a serious shopping addiction and even though money was tight she still ended up spending everything we had, she won a new phone with a competition at work and in the same breath took the last money and bought a camara for herself, this was my breaking point and also i always cleaned but after 3 weeks of actually cleaning up like everything everyday, it feels like im looking after a child or something, i think i moved in with her way to fast and , because of her background everything is always done for her so it’s normal. Ive made sure she has food for 2 months and that’s she has all her needs taken care of if i leave. As i do love her but I don’t like her at all
Im in need of serious advice as im very scared of a face to face breakup as it will result in me feeling so bad and just giving in , i thought about leaving early morning on her off day just leaving a letter but i don’t know .
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I broke up with someone like this 20 years in (lots of on and off), I so wish i could go back in time
It doesn’t get better, that childhood trauma stops them from being capable of operating like an adult.
I too wondered how my now ex would cope without me keeping her head above water, i had been carefully manipulated into her new dad
At first, she hit the ground hard but guess what, the moment she knew i was no longer an option for her, she found someone else to take the role of parent and she did just fine.
You want her gone, cut off the cash and stop doing ANYTHING for her
This isn’t a gold digger/free loader scenario, she needs her partner to replace her shitbag daddy so you get the same problems
This will never end, you both will grow to resent, then despise each other
My ex’s inability to understand money would have bankrupted us, i used that spending addiction to my advantage because once you cut their drug off, they will look anywhere else to find it and then you’re out