It’s not something I consider bad or inappropriate but slightly confusing. I don’t know how to know if there are disingenuous motives-and I have to assume the worst. There are worst things in life-I just want a second opinion.

I’m in a hr job and many of my closer colleagues have started complimenting me on my appearance-at first it was “that’s a cute jumper” or “that looks nice” and now I’m getting “the outfits your wearing a super cute”. They are even coming from people outside my department at this point from people I don’t really talk to much.

I’m not used to it. I was bullied relentlessly in school for the way I look (being bigger-and still a fairly chunky girl in my early 30’s). It’s weird because it’s like “why are they saying this and what motive do they have?”

I am just humbly and awkwardly thanking them but it feels really weird. I’m like “am I cuter than normal?” Which is a confidence boost but it’s anxiety lined with “what do they want from me?”

It’s odd. It’s not a problem it’s just confusing and I don’t really know how to personally comprehend if it’s being nice and honest or being nice for their gain. In my line of work I have to assume the latter but I’m not really sure.

Anybody had experience with this? It’s weird and a very non-problem to have I’m aware.

3 comments
  1. I’m not sure if they have ulterior motives or not, but it’s possible that you actually do look better than most of your co-workers and they’re complementing you because you stand out to them.

  2. It sounds to me that you got out of a previously pretty bad environment and into a pretty sweet one. Comments like “that looks nice” or “that oufit is super cute” are things other people would *kill* for (as well as having anyone notice at all) – not even joking. So you are being noticed for putting effort into your looks and from where I’m standing, there is no reason to think there are any ulterior motives.

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