Thoughts on people who get married right after high school?

26 comments

1. No thoughts, just hope it works out for them. It’s not really for me to say whether it’s wrong or it’s right; you generally don’t know yourself very well out of high school but some people have known what they’ve wanted to do all their life, and I imagine some people have known who they want to marry right from the start.

2. It seems weird and outdated. Like, my mom graduated in the 1960s and she knew people like this. I graduated in the 1990s and I didn’t know anyone who did this. Even the people with surprise pregnancies didn’t get married until several years later.

3. Being from a small town, I know a lot of people who did this. All but one couple divorced before their mid thirties.

4. I think they will both grow together if they have mutual life goals and matching ambition, or they will grow apart with the potential of one hindering the other one.

5. I wish them the best of luck in their relationship and personal growth. Making the adolescent to adulthood transition together can be extremely complicated and painful, so I hope that they have a lot of support and good communication skills.

6. With some people it works, with some it doesn’t. I’m glad I didn’t, though, as I’ve changed significantly since then.

7. I try not to judge, but I do worry about them.

8. Works for some, not all. Good luck to them.

9. I got married at 19 to the guy I was dating through out high school – started when I was 15. He joined the military and we married on his boot leave. Then we moved out of state and then the country. I left him when we came back to the states after a year and a half of being back at 25. Worst decision ever. Surprised I lasted as long as I did, really. Felt like I wasted that whole part of my life. 0/10. Thankfully I had no children with him.

   Edit: to include age

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11. While we waited until later to get married, I married the guy I’ve been with since I was 15.

    It’s been over two decades and not a single regret. Not for one second.

12. I think it’s a very stupid thing to do and it’s most likely not gonna work out, but whatever. Not my life.

13. My friend did it and they are currently pretty miserable.

14. It would not have worked for me, but I have a handful of friends who got married after graduating high school or right after their first year of college. They are living it up as YOUNG empty nesters who get to travel and experience grandkids who know them as young and vital people. Meanwhile, my youngest is a toddler… BUT when my husband and I got married we had no debt, we both had careers and our own retirement plans as well as savings. We’d lived in various life situations and had lots of experiences to bring into a marriage and raising families. We’ve not struggled financially and have great communication. For some of my early married friends it wasn’t so easy. I think there are trade offs for each decision that is made, but there can be something beautiful in knowing what you want at a young age and having the fearlessness (and inexperience) to get married and grow up with someone. I just know that it wouldn’t have worked for ME in particular, but I’ve seen it be very successful for others.

15. i mean, if they are happy, who am I to judge?

16. I’m neutral on the topic. I know people who got engaged even sooner than that, know one who is going to get engaged soon and my partner is probably going to propose to me before I go to college too. (I have graduated high school but since it’s both a high school and a technical school at once, we had the option to stay one more year and get our certificates in our chosen fields too. I decided to stay)

    At the same time I understand why people think it’s stupid because let’s be real, the majority don’t know themselves well enough at that stage or simply grow apart. In my case, I know we are planning on getting engaged soon but that doesn’t mean we gotta get married right away. It probably won’t be all that far in the future either, but we’ll see

17. I don’t think it’s a good idea but I’m sure it works out for some people. I have a feeling most of the time, there is one party that is proposing some sort of ultimatum, and the other party is young and inexperienced, and doesn’t want to lose their partner, so they agree. Almost everyone I know that did this (I’m 27) has already gotten divorced. ETA: Don’t get me wrong, I don’t necessarily think divorce means a relationship was useless or a complete failure. I do however think marriage in general is iffy.

18. My question is, aside from religious reasons, what’s the rush? Why not wait until you’ve grown up a bit? If he or she is really the one, they’re not going to disappear in a puff of smoke because you didn’t marry them fast enough.

    I think you owe it to yourself and your partner to live a little, see the world, experience things, figure out what you really want out of life. I personally changed so much from high school to my mid-late 20’s – sure I could’ve made promises to my high school boyfriend and truly meant them at the time… but I was a totally different person by age 25.

19. If that’s what they both want and are happy, good for them. I know a handful of people who were together in high school, were married during college/out of high school, and are perfectly happy.

20. Imo it’s way too early. As teenagers it’s all lovey dovey, but after high school it’s a whole new world. Imo it’s better to grow up and gain some life experience, definitely live together and be together longer than high school and if it works then heck yea. But if not at least you’re not having to divorce ur ex from high school

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22. Tbh I don’t see an issue with them marrying(like why not marry the one you wanna marry yknow?) but my only *concern* I guess is if they’re doing it out of insecurity or because they had a kid or something(might not even be in love). From what I see it works for some and doesn’t for others, but its on the couple and not the fact that they married early.

23. I did it in 2006. Just got divorced in April of this year. So we made it 15.5 years. I’m still pretty sad about it but life goes on..

24. I think it’s foolish, to be perfectly honest. We still have very little world experience right after high school, the brain isn’t done developing until age ~25, and the twenties in general are such a rapid, intense period of change for so many people. No matter how compatible and in love a couple is, or how well they communicate and are committed to one another…it’s impossible to tell what paths they’ll end up on as they move from childhood to adulthood.

    Marriage is a bit of a crapshoot to begin with, but doing it young makes that all the more true. At the end of the day, luck is the most essential ingredient for any couple to last.

    Not about lecture anyone in real life, though. People can do what they want.

25. Sounds good. You will still be young enough to start over your life after divorce lol.

26. I am absolutely not the person I was as a teenager, so im grateful I was never in that situation. I think some of them grow at the same rate, but it’s a gamble. You also risk the possibility of not growing at all since you got together, which is what I more frequently have seen. As a repercussion, it feels like it stunts you. Some people pull through, but most seem to be forever stuck at the age when they met their partner.