What would be the best way to tell a man the things you want in the bedroom without offending him?

24 comments

1. Ikea catalog?

2. By compliments usually. “I like it a lot when you do that, don’t stop” ,etc etc. Strokes their ego more than it hurts it.

3. Well, hopefully he should at some point ask you if there’s anything he can do for you to make things “better” …. but if he doesn’t, maybe just say something like “would you mind if I asked you to do something a little different for me?”

4. Find a meme about how amazing foreplay is then share it in your family group chat (with the bf included) saying “lol SO TRUE”

5. “I really enjoyed when you did (foreplay).
   Can we do more of that?”

6. Frame it as what you like, not as what he’s doing wrong.

7. Just tell him straight

8. “I don’t want to offend you, but here’s what I really want in the bedroom”

9. If he’s offended he’s not the right guy

10. I’ve gotten over trying to avoid stepping on toes a very long time ago. Be straight forward with what you want. Life’s too short to have sub par sex. I’ve been with my partner for a long time and we still regularly have talks about what we want and what we want to try. You both need to be willing to communicate in this area if it’s for the long haul. Don’t be a dick, but just flat out tell them what you need. If they’re offended over you communicating a need they’re not worth being with

11. If you cant say tell him spit on my face when i sucking you off and slow or speed your thrusts up without him being a beta…..find a wolf!

12. The only way to ask for something without offending is to make a positive affirmation.

    For example, don’t say « you don’t spend enough time on foreplay, could you do better? », but say « remember that time you spent more time on foreplay? It was really amazing, I loved it so much! » and then you can jokingly say something like « don’t hesitate to spend 30 minutes on it (like, input your number) I won’t blame you for that »

    Something along those lines I guess? Because when a woman tells me I’ve been incredible and wants me to do it again, I like it; but if she tells me I wasn’t enough and I could be more, it’s a huge turnoff.

13. Just say it. Don’t be a pussy

14. Could just be like, look what you’re doing is great but I need more foreplay to make it better, that shouldn’t offend him at all

15. If he gets his feelings hurt because you need more foreplay that’s on him to figure out

16. You could take a more active role in the foreplay and just don’t give him a chance to get started. Tease HIM more. Sit on his face…

17. When he does something you like, ask him to do it more.

18. Get comfortable talking about sex. Take it at whatever pace works for both of you but get comfortable talking about sex. Communication is the key to the best sex.

19. You are okay with letting some guy, that isn’t your husband, do you? But you can’t find the words to tell him what you want in the process of the screwing?

    ​

    Beam me up, Scotty…

20. Do this…tell him it’s something you read in Cosmo and to not be a drag and just do it. Be assertive.

    Next get index cards and split them into two stacks. One for you and one for him.

    Now tell him to write what turns him on. 1 turn on per index card. And you do the same for your set.

    Finally shuffle the cards together and the next time it’s fuck time. Pull out 3 cards and both of you must do what is on the cards. No matter what it is!!

21. Date a man instead of a boy.

    Allow me to explain (from a man; ex-boy):

    You: “Could you do this instead?”

    Boy: “Oh, so you don’t like the way I do it? Is that it? Is this how one of your exes used to do it? Which one? There were so many, you probably…”et cetera, ad nauseam.

    Or:

    You: “Could you-“

    Man: “Let me stop you there, darling; tell me *exactly* what you want me to do – what technique, what rhythm, what speed, and what pressure – and I will *do* it.”

    Sidenote: Men are teenage boys until we’re 35.

    Not all men. Some men never grow up.

    Tl;dr: Tell your boyfriend to quit being a baby, or get a new boyfriend. Preferably (for your sanity) >35.

22. Whatever you do don’t be direct or honest about what you want. That is an instant boner killer. Instead let those feelings of sexual dissatisfaction smolder into a conflagration of intense resentment that will consume your relationship whole. Then you can go find a different guy who actually knows how to touch a boobie right.

23. “Lick me out first you selfish maggot”

24. >without possible offending him or hurting his feelings.

    Make it seem like your idea.

    Tell him what you want him to do, what happens if he does it and how it will make things mutually beneficial.

    Something like, ” Babe, I want to try some more foreplay before sex. It makes me even hornier, horny enough to fuck the soul out of you.”…or something like that.

    If he’s not yet getting it, tell him you’re like those classic Italian sports cars that need to warm up for a bit before fully opening the throttle. Maybe car speak will get through to him.