What made you realize if you were easy on the eyes and how would you consider the people you gravitate towards when it comes to appearance?

4 comments

1. Confidence is key I think. I used to be insecure and I’m now really happy with my appearance and get a lot of compliments and attention. I don’t think I changed I just learned to embrace my flaws and not focus on things I don’t like. For example I’m tall and used to feel awkward about it, now I realise it makes me stand out.

2. i always knew i was average looking. i don’t consider my self attractive to the point where im getting attention from others. to a certain extent, it’s confidence. when I started becoming more confident, more ppl gravitated towards me. I’d say the same for myself. i tend to gravitate towards average looking/confident people

3. People have stared at me and complimented me obsessively since I was a very young child. I hated it and it made me feel very unsafe, and multiple times resulted in me turning out to be unsafe with these people. I always find most anything beyond one simple compliment delivered at an appropriate momen (like not right after hello) unnecessary and untrustworthy. We get it, looks matter, but it does become dehumanizing. The person knows you think they’re attractive, even if you’re only looking for something casual, just shut up about it for the part where you’re supposed to be talking to establish basic human respect between each other. Come back to the obsessive complimenting if you’re getting freaky and it turns them on. Otherwise find something else to talk about.

   I am no longer truly attracted to people based on appearance. I do gravitate toward some people based on things like I guess fashion. I can in some cases tell my kind of person by others around age 30 who don’t look steretypically ‘professional’ even if that makes them the odd one out in the setting. I’m talking about friendships here as much as dating.

4. People love to tell you that they like your appearance and it’s always the first topic, I recently went to a bar whilst I had a very shitty time and wasn’t in the best mood and I guess I rather looked anxious, when I crossed a table with about ten men my age they loudly discussed this, one of them declared that I’m the prettiest woman around but I seem so shy and what a waste this is and a lot more comments that made me even more anxious because I didn’t want attention I simply wanted to have a good time with my friends.
   I’m usually confident and reactions like this gave me a sense for men that are not worth my time and after 15 years of dating appearance comes second when I date.
   So I prefer men that look like they have their life together and don’t act like entitled teenagers.