So I started dating someone who is paralyzed from the waist down and I’m not quit sure how to proceed sexually. I don’t know if she experiences pleasure from penetration and am not sure how to ask. This all so new to me but I really like her and want this to work. So far we’ve made out and she’s really liked the stuff I do but I would like to further our sexual relationship and pleasure her in the right ways I guess.
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Well you are gonna have to bite the bullet on this one buddy, you’ll just have to ask her if she has any feeling or if she would like to try something like that out. Obviously don’t force her into anything she doesn’t want to do, I don’t expect that from you. But you wont be able to know unless you ask her. If she wants to try it out than that’s great for you, if she doesn’t know then leave it up to her to decide, and if she has no feeling down there and therefore cant feel pleasure, there isn’t much you can do there, however if she wants to continue regardless that might be something.
Hope this helps
(51F) Definitely gonna have to converse about it. Hopefully if you’re both on the same page, exploring and learning will be more fun! Even discussing it may bring up possibilities…?
A couple of quick suggestions:
*Can we have an adult but not overly serious chat?
*Would you be open to trying more than making out? If so, can we discuss boundaries/limits and of course expectations?
Wishing you both the best Hun❣️
You need to have this conversation with her. There are different possible realities, so you may want to think about that. Hope everything works out for the two of you.
Most women with spinal cord injuries can achieve orgasm. My girlfriend is paralyzed from nipple line down. And she can get wet and feel pleasure. We have a great sexual relationship. Most people with spinal cord injuries don’t have control over their bladders and bowel, and sex can cause accidents, so you need to make sure you are comfortable with that. You need to talk about it with her and go at her pace. Make her feel comfortable and sexy.
Definitely have the conversation. Think about what your response will be if she is unable to engage in the sexual activity you desire. If it isn’t for you, then that’s your choice, but I would consider a kind and thoughtful response. It’s not uncommon for people in similar situations to feel inadequate and worry about whether their partner would be pleased with them as they are. Just be honest and open with her and let her know you want to respect her boundaries and make her feel good.