I want to be sexier and flirtier with my gf, but both of us are exhausted and I feel bad asking for stuff or telling her how I feel.

My gf and I (both early to mid twenties) have a great relationship and live together, but we both work demanding jobs while we’re also in graduate school. We have sex maybe once or twice over the weekend, but apart from that nothing more than cuddling and kissing. I miss when we’d go at it several times a day and I want that desire to somehow come back, but I feel bad asking for something when she’s clearly tired and not in the mood. Even bringing up how I feel and how we should put aside time on our schedule to be naked together makes me feel bad because I know that it upsets her to think that I’m not happy (I am, I just want more intimate time!). I know how much is on her plate and how drained she is, but at times it makes me feel like she doesn’t desire me.

What can I do? The other night I got myself off in the bathroom after she fell asleep in my arms because I was literally too hard to even consider falling sleep after a few days with no release. I don’t like that as a reality.

I can ask for head and she’d go down on me, but it’s not enjoyable when it’s out of duty instead of appreciation. I’ve also thought about asking her if i can rub one out next to her since we’ve done mutual masturbation a few times. Regardless though, the problem is not that I’m horny af, its that the lust and desire is lacking. Any tips?