So I slept with one of my gym trainers after we all went to a concert together. I’ve been going to my gym for almost a year. There are three super nice male personal trainers. I get along with all of them so will train with them all separately. A couple nights ago we all went to a show together, and afterwards me and one of the guys slept together. We’d gone back to one of the guys apartment because everyone’s cars were there. Everyone had left/ gone to bed and we were cuddling on the couch, we started kissing and ended up having sex. He drove me home after and kissed me again before I went in. During the show he bought me drinks, kept holding my hand and waist and just generally being protective. Whilst we were having sex, he kept saying he’d wanted to fuck me for a long time. I haven’t been back to the gym since because I haven’t been feeling well, but I’m not sure how I should act when I do go in again. Do I act as though nothing happened? Do I message him before to talk about what happened?
Update!
I messaged him. Took him a while to reply because he was working. I basically said it was very fun, but unexpected and wanted to make sure the wouldn’t be any awkwardness between us. He agreed and told me that he’s just out of a relationship so it was definitely nothing more than sex. No feelings attached. But we agreed that we’d both be down to hook up again.
16 comments
Do you think it happened due to alcohol or because he truly is into you and wanted you?
If it’s the former, it could be awkward. If it’s the latter – would you been into him and going out with him or hooking up with him again?
I’d say do whatever YOU feel most comfortable with. I usually go with pretend like nothing happened and play it by ear from there
Depends what you want to happen. Do you want to do it again? Talk to him. If you just want to move on, you don’t have to say anything. He’s a professional in a commercial environment, it’s his job to treat you the same as any other client.
Ah, to be a fit man in a position of quasi-authority. Good on that guy, he knew what he was doing and has done it before. It probably won’t be awkward for him so don’t worry too much.
I would say message him a friendly message telling him whether you are or are not willing to sleep with him again so he knows where he stands and knows whether advances are welcome or not. Than go to the gym and treat him like a friend (which he is) but if you don’t want his sexual advances again correct him if he tries anything like putting your hand on you inappropriately.
It’s important to not act like it didn’t happen or like you didn’t enjoy it, as that is hurtful to him. Acknowledge to him that it happened but ask him to respect that what happened doesn’t necessarily mean you want it to happen again.
You should definitely take the interaction with him out of the gym. It’s his place of work, and things would definitely be awkward there. If you have his number, call him or text and meet up somewhere. Once you’ve settled on which direction things will be going, then you can peacefully go back to the gym. But don’t go talk with him at his place of work.
Not well? Suggest a hiv test.
Straight up say it was a one time thing.
If the sex was good just make him a friends with benefits. He’s got a good bod take advantage of it.
Act normal? Its only as weird as you make it. Have a conversation to establish whether it was a one off thing, or whether either of are interested in more of the same, so you both know where you stand. Also do tell him you weren’t back because you weren’t feeling well, and it was nothing to do with him. Even if you don’t intend to fuck again, it would probably be a load off his mind. I know I’d be wondering if I did something wrong and you were avoiding me.
If you do decide to see more of each other, ask him what his boundaries at work are. Maybe it’d be ok to flirt, maybe he needs to keep it strictly professional during work hours.
Sounds like the perfect opportunity for a solid FWB relationship! Question is – are you also interested in another round or more?
U============))
You are a woman, act however you ACTUALLY want to. If you wanted to again flirt if you don’t don’t flirt.
He will adapt.
Laughter is always good. Make a joke, then the ice is broken and just play it by ear.
Uh, sounds like he’s into you.
Are you into him? If so, text him and ask him out for a date.
If not, then just let him know that.
You could message him to clear the air!
Don’t do squats
It doesn’t take months for a Hiv test…check any Clinic in the US.