This awesome woman [27F] & I [28M] met & started dating on the east coast about ~4 months ago when I was visiting home (i currently live on the west coast but was looking to move back east at the time). Between then and now i’ve been back & forth between coasts for family reasons but also extending those trips so i can spend time with her. I work remote so I’m lucky to have the flexibility.
Coincidentally, when we started dating she had already planned on moving west to do travel nursing & recently she settled on a job about 30 minutes away from where i live on the west coast. She’s moving out west in about a month and I’m currently back East visiting (staying at my parents) while she’s been staying at her’s.
Even though half the time i’ve on the opposite coast, the dates have been going great, we’ve been intimate & met each others parents + friends. The problem: recently i boneheadedly brought up the prospect of a relationship & she responded by saying she’s not ready to commit right now and see how we fair dating out west. Obviously, that hurts a touch but things have still been good since that convo. I respect her timeline and want to try to keep making casually dating work but should I be more concerned? In a few days i’ll be going back west & we’ll be apart for 3 or 4 wks until she moves out so maybe some space is best for both of us.
Anyone have any similar experiences?
2 comments
Lots going on it seems so her wanting to take it slow and actually getting to know the real you is a good sign.
I’ve noticed that many women view a committed relationship differently than men. As a man we just wanna know she’s not sleeping with anyone else haha…..for a woman she wants to know the man she chooses hasn’t put up a front that’s gonna come down after hitting it with a label.
Hmmmm that’s a tough one, and I can see why you’re a little stung by her soft rejection for now. However, as one of the other posters said, she probably has a lot going on in her life now, with the big move coming up. She probably wants to keep things casual until she is settled in her new home and develops her own routine. She probably doesn’t want to associate living in a new city with the idea that she moved there for you, even though she technically moved for her work. Give her a little bit of time, continue to date her after she has moved, and see how things go. No guarantees currently as to whether it works out or not, you’ll just have to decide whether you want to give it a chance knowing it may not work out in the end.