I’m a m(17) and I’m in need of advice on how to gain the confidence to tell this girl I like her. We’ve been friends since our freshman year (now we’re seniors) and I caught feelings our sophomore year for her but I was always low on confidence and self esteem due to my body and outlook on myself. Now that I’ve lost my weight I guess I need advice on how to overcome my awkwardness and low confidence in girls. Any advice?
2 comments
>always low on confidence and self esteem
**anxiety prevention tip:**
I think you’d likely benefit from practising ‘quiet times’ of 20-30 minutes of just sitting and Not dwelling on anything (a form of meditation). Very difficult at first (I needed to watch a DVD of nature scenes / a fireplace as an anchor/distraction to keep my mind from wandering). youtube has lots of fireplace videos. Others intone ‘mantras’ or focus on breathing.
There are several benefits: better sleep, easier days (upsets do not hit nearly as hard), and I think that likely after practising “not dwelling” on anything, you’ll have better control of your thoughts and acquire the ability to ‘turn off’ your anxiety reaction to situations.
At first doing this daily should work best. After awhile, only as needed. I’ve been doing this for about two decades and lately have only felt an urge to do it a half dozen days of the year.
A useful lesser calming practice is to do housework routines for say five minutes at a slower (70-80% rate) pace — a form of ‘walking meditation’, which you may find similarly soul refreshing.
I think the best advice would just be to just rip the band-aid off and do it — next time you see her, start a conversation and ask her out someplace.