I feel confused about what a good relationship should look like or if I am not being treated like a boyfriend.

I (25M) been dating this girl (24F) for almost 3 months now, it went well up until lately. To be more specific over the summer we were one city apart and she usually made time willingly to come over for a couple of days at least once a month. Although now we are in the same city and I am confused if this is what a healthy relationship should look like or that I don’t get the attention I seek.
I am trying to learn from my past relationships, this time I am actually communicating my wants and needs and encourage her to do as well too. The thing that makes me question these things is that, I feel that I am the one that organises the dates 95% of the time, she doesn’t really initiate these things most of the time. I have to ask multiple times if she wants to sleep over at my place and the first answers I get are a “I don’t know yet” before turning into a “yes”.
My problem is that my past relationships all left me with trauma, I’ve been cheated on multiple times and it’s something that keeps me awake at night (she does know about these aspects of my past, but not that they involuntarily keep me awake at night).
Since all my past relationships ended with me heartbroken, my coping mechanism was always to go above and beyond for someone, which I know it’s not right, that is why I am a bit confused if this is how a healthy relationship is like or if I lack the attention I seek.
Am I just too needy or is this how a healthy relationship should look like? Right now I feel like we are more friends with benefits rather than lovers.

I would like to tell her tonight that it makes me feel like a burden the fact that I have to initiate all the meetings most of the time and I would like some more effort from her side.