So I’m a 30 year old virgin guy and my friend told me I need to get a practice girl is that good advice?

12 comments

1. No it isn’t, and your friend sounds like a douche. The real question here is… Why didn’t you have a relationship/first kiss/anything else up until now?

2. That’s not good advice that’s messed up to use somebody like that, your friend sounds like a dick

3. Prostitute, a person you are looking for is a prostitute.

   And even then, luckily, most sex workers have a choice on whether to take a client or not.

   Something tells me, though, neither your “friend” nor you will have any success, given you are 30 and still have some jelly instead of a properly functioning brain.

4. You certainly should practice building healthy and honest relationships with women but your friend is a complete dick.

   “Fat girls” aren’t automatically desperate and they certainly should be treated with respect even if they aren’t your type.

   Don’t mess with people’s feelings but doput yourself out there honestly and authentically.

5. You’re 100% right, that advice is evil.

   And also, it won’t help. A relationship on which you are constantly consciously deceiving and objectifying someone does not, in any way, build good skills or habits for a genuine healthy partnership.

6. At its base it’s not terrible advice, a low stakes relationship where the goal is for you and the girl to just have casual fun, can be a great way for you to build relationship skills. It takes away some of the stress that you can place on yourself, you’re less likely to do something like proposing marriage a week in, blowing up their phone with texts because they didn’t respond soon enough, and other decisions you can make because you’re inexperienced in relationships

   Lowering your “standards” can also sometimes be a great way to meet people you do connect with, but you’d previously skipped over because of some perceived flaw

   The problem comes with framing this partner as a “practice” girl, and in finding someone who you think will be happy to have sex with you because you think they’re not attractive. It takes away the agency from the person you’re dating. They should know that you’re looking for a casual chill relationship because you don’t feel ready for a serious relationship, and you shouldn’t assume that they’ll be into you because they’re not models.

7. Your friend sounds like a colossal douchenozzle, but I think there some small amount of sense in what he’s saying. By that I mean you definitely would benefit from some practice interacting with women, from social to personal to intimate.

   Don’t be a terrible person and get that experience by lying to some poor girl. But maybe consider you can do the same thing without being dishonest.

   There are definitely women out there who look for casual relationships just like men do. There’s nothing wrong with meeting someone, being honest about needing more experience with women but not wanting something serious, and moving forward with a consensual understanding of what you’re both looking for.

   People date one another without necessarily expecting a long-term commitment regularly. There’s nothing wrong with doing the same as long as you’re not taking advantage of the other person in the process.

8. It sounds cruel and heartless.

9. I was also a 30-year-old male a few years ago. I’m not a virgin anymore. The only thing that’s ever worked for me is to work on yourself. I don’t necessarily mean going to the gym, or dressing well, or anything like that. Chase your aspirations. Get out of your comfort zone. Do the things you always wanted to do but were too afraid to whether that’s in terms of your hobbies, or joining social circles, or whatever else. Heaps of people have told me to settle, or get a hooker or whatever. It’s all BS.

10. No it is horrid advice. Your friend is suggesting something evil. Get it out of your head that sex itself is an accomplishment. It is not. That’s a lie told by shallow and confused men. Men waste the early years of their lives believing this and chasing women. Real accomplishments are attractive. Like doing well in your career, volunteering, being smart with investments, being physically fit, excelling in your hobbies, etc.

    What you can do is practice having platonic conversations with women in group settings. For instance, look for young adults groups in your area. But do not lead a woman on or start a relationship if you are not interested. That would be cruel.

11. >So yeah I’m 30, a virgin, never had a girlfriend, and never had my 1st kiss though once way back in HS I did hold a girl’s hand for a few seconds.

    Are you following me?😶

    >Basically find some girl I’m not attracted to (or in his words some fat girl) and try to have some casual relationship with her, don’t get attached and just see what works and what doesn’t in a relationship and get familiar with women.

    Oh, this is a very old tactic Chad’s do, in essence you do need to gain experience but this is part of why the dating scene is so garbage, a bunch of average, below attractive or or pretty women are just being shared by these dudes who where never going to commit, leave and then the women are “all men” this & that.

    Years, decades back, a lot of young men actually hired prostitutes for the physical stuff (not a recommendation, just a history lesson).

    It’s good advice in the sense that it has results but it’s terrible advice due to the overall damage it causes. Don’t do it, don’t be “that” guy.😑

12. your friend is a big douche, change your company.