I don’t have any history of alcoholism or drug abuse in my family of origin, I’ve grown up with narcissist parents, so I’ve done a LOT of work on myself, but and still trying to figure out what it might be about me that attracts alcoholics/drug abusers??
I’m not codependent, narcissistic, or needy. I am pretty independent, take care of myself and have a good steady job using my degree. I’d like to meet a normal, well-adjusted, available man – do these even exist anymore? TIA!
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> I’d like to meet a normal, well-adjusted, available man – do these even exist anymore?
Pretty sure. What have you been doing to meet said men?
And as to why you attract those guys, I’d chalk it up to either being conventionally attractive or just having your shit together. I imagine you don’t ONLY attract those types of dudes, right?
Or it could be the places you frequent. Are you a clubber or something?
A therapist can help you work this out.
Look at you playing the victim. Take responsibility for your actions. You don’t attract these men, you CHOOSE them.
Be more selective. Drug Abusers/Alcoholics tend to be less inhibited (because drugs and alcohol). So they won’t really worry about getting rejected and will shoot their shot with you. You may mistake that for confidence and self esteem.
Maybe be organic and meet people in person. Is that hard to do these days?? Idk.
Because they’re looking for someone independent who will take care of them. Just say no.