So a really good (girl)friend of mine that I have known for five years just kind of confessed to me that she really likes me, even though she wanted to just stay friends 3 years ago when I said I really liked her. She is just the best person if we’re talking about norms and values, we just match and we are really comfortable with each other. Her confession to me was just a shocker.
Here comes the but…
I currently have a girlfriend at this moment for almost a year, and even though we have had our ups and downs, I love her very much. However, we don’t really have the same interest in each other’s hobbies and our norms and values differ. We had some fights about setting priorities, she felt she wasn’t my main priority and everytime i tried my best to do better but it seems like it always isn’t enough for her… (which in my opinion i really do set her as my main priority). It is really tiring to do the same thing again and again without getting recognision for it. Everytime we have such a heated agrument the topic ending our relationship comes to the surface but it always ends up being good again.
I just feel a little bit mixed up in my feelings. I really love my girlfriend but sometimes we have moments where things just don’t go that well. (i guess that’s every relationship right?).
On the other hand, the girl(friend) confessed to me, we just match, but she rejected me when I asked her out…
I know what the best answer is but I would like to ask you guys/girls for advice/opinion…
Thank you for reading this whole post ^_^
8 comments
Two separate issues. Evaluate your current relationship on its own merits, forget about the chick you aren’t with. Otherwise you might regret any decision you make. If you did decide you were unhappy with ur girl and you broke up, then it’s time to think about if this old friend new girl is a good idea or not. Can’t help you make those decisions, but came to say don’t mix them together cus it ends badly.
if you wanna date her then do so. you clearly dont love your girlfriend anymore
Now she you as catch ..
What they say …. “I like what she having”
The second girl wants to be with you only because you’re not available anymore. Proceed at your own risk, once you dump your gf and become available this friend may not want you anymore.
As for your gf, do you actually really love her? Because it sounds like she is a placeholder. Even if you have fights with her, your options should be to work it out or go separate ways. But it sounds like you’ve been ok with it…. until your ‘friend’ came along, the same girl you ask out 3 years ago. Now suddenly you’re having major doubts about gf.
Either way, gf deserves better
There is a lot of people out there and we can spend our lives with a huge portion of them and be decently happy.
Not all of them slide into all the nauced match making aspects of our individual personalities.
Break up with your gf and give it a try with that friend.
You find that other girl as “perfect”/matching for yourself so you’re already with one foot at the door here. If you think so but don’t do it, then you may just start thinking “What if..?” later on OR worse, start emotionally cheathing on your gf.
What a Triangulating mess. Very convenient for you. If your GF and you have a rough patch—and they will come—your chances of getting skewed advice, your “friend” consciously or unconsciously making herself looks attractive/soooo understanding/etc. to grow emotional intimacy, is *very high.*
What an unfortunate sad mess where some will get hurt immediately…or hurt later with time.
This is going to sound harsh but please break up with your gf. You shouldnt be in a relationship if you’re constantly thinking about another person and obviously in this case, you sound like you have feelings for that girl. Don’t lead your gf on the