I’ve liked this guy for four years now and I’ve finally decided to tell him how I feel. I wrote out what I’m going to send him via text bc we don’t really talk much. I’m scared to get rejected but I have get it off my chest and move on if he doesn’t like me back. I’m just wondering is it weird for a girl to ask a guy out? In what I wrote I didn’t exactly ask him out I just said that I liked him and that I’d like to get to know him if he’s up for that.
Edit: I talked to my friends about it (they’ve been invested in this from the beginning so might as well see it through) and I decided to tell him this Thursday in person at lunch. Hopefully all goes well.
22 comments
>I’m just wondering is it weird for a girl to ask a guy out?
It is not. If you’re planning on writing him this grand essay about your undying affection for him, please reconsider. It will probably just weird him out and make him uncomfortable. If you want to date this guy, ask him to go on a date. That’s it.
>I’m just wondering is it weird for a girl to ask a guy out?
No. Not at all.
>In what I wrote I didn’t exactly ask him out I just said that I liked him and that I’d like to get to know him if he’s up for that.
Perfect. That’s all you needed to say.
I would advise against spilling all ur affection in a text all at once. Just touch base talk for a bit if u want then ask him out on a date.
If you want my opinion, shorten the message considerably. Just ask him out. Confessions usually guarantee rejection, especially if you really don’t know anything about him.
I’m not a guy but tbh I don’t see anything wrong with the girl making the first move. Of course, you’re going to have people tell you that the man should be the pursuer and they are allowed to have that opinion. However, the way I see it, if you think someone is cute… just go up and strike up a conversation! You don’t even have to flirt just be casual and if they aren’t interested then just respect that and move on. Life is too short to be waiting around, if you see an opportunity.. grab it ! You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
He won’t think about it much. As a person on the receiver end I usually just appreciate it for 10 minutes of my day, and respond according to my honest feelings.
However when I crush on someone usually I overcomplicate it and overthink about them for weeks. They don’t deserve so much thoughts.
From my experience it’s better to do it in person rather than via text. I once confessed to a guy via text and he called me a b**** and took screenshots of the conversation (I didn’t have a reputation of being easy and I didn’t know him well). If I had done it in person I know he wouldn’t reject me that rudely
Go for it. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
The worst thing that can happen is he’ll say he’s not interested and then you can come to terms with that and move on sooner.
If he’s not interested then the longer you leave it the more it will hurt if he says no and the more time you’ll have wasted crushing on someone who wasn’t interested in you in that way.
And if he is interested then the sooner you tell him the more time you’ll have together.
So do it. Take the shot. Either way you’re either wasting time if you don’t or saving time if you do.
Do not under any circumstance text a confession
Tell him in person
Try talking to him first. It might work if you ask him out out of nowhere. For that to work you will have to be attractive. Just try to befriend him first and see if he is okay with being friendly with you
Talk to him personally about how you feel, dont tell him by text,it dosent come off as genuine and you can see he’s reaction. Ask him to go on a date dosent have to be anything fancy.
Yes, it’s totally okay for a girl to ask a guy out: old-fashioned ideas that this is not okay are overdue for retirement. But of course if you do, you will run the same risk of rejection that men run every time they ask out a girl. Here’s my suggestion from a male perspective: don’t specifically say that you like him, just ask him out. It’s a lower pressure proposition
I’ve been ignoring a situation like this with one of my guy best friends for 7 years now, hoping it will go away. We barely talk anymore; I used to call and check on him and just talk about things with him, but I don’t anymore because I’m afraid he’ll figure it out; and back in high school, he joked that if I wasn’t in a relationship, would I have given him a chance, and I said no. That was a lie, I love him, and I wish I could do something about it that wouldn’t make our friendship awkward, and I also don’t want my other friends to think differently of me.
It’s not weird to ask a guy out. Don’t overdo it by writing an essay of love and your feelings. Something short and sweet is probably better. Good luck!
Contrary to what most think, being rejected and brushing it off is so much more attractive than being constantly validated.
Not weird at all! In my past I’ve made the first move plenty of times. Guys can be shy so it takes the pressure off them. And if they don’t like a woman that has the confidence to make the first move then you don’t need him. Other guys will appreciate it.
Sometimes it worked out, other times it didn’t. If it didn’t and I got rejected, then at least I tried, and I can move on and not wonder “what if?”.
Is it WEIRD??!!!! Girl, us men these days are SCARED to ask out women. Do you have any idea how much of a MASSIVE turn on it is for a woman to walk right up to us and make it clear af that she is interested and wants to go out with us?! We men are easy AF. Do it, just go and damn do it!
Just go up and say “hey, gotta admit, you seem like a really great guy. And I think you’re also, well, cute and was wondering if you’d like to go out on a a date sometime? If not, that’s alright.” And have a sincere smile.
That direct approach can make a man’s pupils morph into little hearts
@ OP these are the scenarios which I also hopefully don’t have to face where I have no idea of the other gender’s feelings towards me and by the time I know it might already be too late. But then again approaching the person too early led me to getting issues like dry texting and finding it hard to keep the convo going without getting ghosted etc.
> I’m just wondering is it weird for a girl to ask a guy out?
No, not at all. Some guys, myself included, would prefer for a girl to show interest in us first actually. I wait patiently for the day it happens for me, because the times I as a guy asked a girl out, its always ended badly and in some cases worse than rejection. Sometimes, things worse than rejection can happen to guys, because society shits on them and can call them creeps for an advance gone wrong. That doesnt happen to women. So please take that first step. 🙂
Four years damn. You’re truly an expert in hiding feelings.
GL! And it’s very attractive for a girl to ask a guy out. “Hey let’s do this, do that, drive up the coast”
I would suggest skipping the paragraph & just casually letting him know that you want him. A flirty message goes a LONG way.