I know there’s probably been other posts like this but this week has been one of those where I can’t stop thinking about it. I’m 22F and I’ve never been in a relationship, I’ve never even had my first kiss. It makes me feel so unwanted and helpless.
And it’s not like I haven’t tried. I’ve gone on dating apps, I’ve had a couple dates that went nowhere, I’ve given my number to guys I thought were cute. But still…nothing ever happens! And it’s not like I’m down on myself. I think I’m pretty, fun to be around, and a good person. All my friends tell me, “you’ll find someone” or if I say no one has ever liked me in that way they go “that’s not true” but can never pinpoint a time where anyone liked me. All my friends have been in relationships or at least had their first kiss, I feel like I’m so behind everyone while people are getting married and having kids.
Normally it doesn’t bother me either but sometimes I do crave a relationship and want that companionship. I love being independent and being by myself but I also can’t help but wonder what it’s like to be in a relationship. This has just been one of those weeks where I just find myself questioning my worth and wondering why it can’t be me.
tl;dr never been in a relationship and scared i never will
5 comments
Well, the answer is in your post. Dating apps aka mostly hookups, and giving number to cute guys. Rather than using hookup sites and using physical attributes be your deciding factors, hang out with people. Get to know people. Give your number to the guy that may not be “cute” but made you laugh. The guy you have good conversations with. The guys you already know and know they aren’t just after a quickie.
You are 22 so try not to worry about finding someone to marry. You will be fine just continue what you are doing and continue with the dating apps. It is easier said than done but try and appear more confident.
Like you said this isn’t the only one of these posts out there. Find someone who respects you and fulfills you. Don’t worry about anything else or how long it takes.
try reverse engineering my tip for guys:
‘eye contact’
Are you able to respond to eye contact? eg. A girl across the room gives you ‘the eye’ (holds your gaze longer than normal, not just once but two or more times).
Can you go up to her if she’s attractive to you, and introduce yourself? Perhaps engage her in conversation leading to an offer of a date (by you), or, exchange of texting numbers (with the objective of ultimately offering to date her via text).
Dating apps are how you use them.
Did I think 5yrs later I’d be with this guy? Absolutely not.
So date, but be selective. And it’s ok to change your parameters.
My guy wasn’t anything I selected. It was literal fate.
Honestly I wasn’t doing anything at all when we matched for a date.
And then he made me laugh. Actual belly laugh. I absolutely love him to bits.
There’s more. Obviously.
But I wouldn’t have picked him, going from my previous ‘dream guy’.
But mentally we just clicked! Now he is the sexiest guy on the planet.
And he still makes me laugh
When I look at my fellow man, it’s sad just how desperate some men are to have someone in their life. I truly think even a single mom with 10 kids from 10 different fathers could still find some man. Point I’m making is, every woman has willing men somewhere out there. Guess you have determine if you swiping left on too many guys because you looking for someone that doesn’t exist