Soooo….a couple months ago I brought it up to my girlfriend that her vagina smells off. This was literally in the midst of the first week we met. It was a tad awkward bringing it up cause I didnt know exactly how to word it or how she would take it, but im happy I did. I told her that im worried she may have a vaginosis bacteria and Im concerned. She noted that its probably cause of her diet and what shes been eating. She also said she has this cream that would better the smell. I was like okay great to know. A month later, the smell was still there. While having intercourse I told her I cant do this, the smell is off putting. She took it not that well. So now, 2 months in, last night the smell is still fucking there. I didnt tell her during intercourse i just said Im tired. What the fuck do I do now. Like seriously its so off putting, today I watched porn to get off. I havent watched porn in ages but man its triggering me. Shes great and all, but mannnn, I need some help here guys. Thanks in advance !
Update: I did go ahead and tell her the 3rd time, and lemme tell you…oh fuck she did not take it so well. I also added that I’m worried for her health and that I’m getting less sexually attracted to her
She at first was defensive and said well ok well thanks for telling me, I guess we wont have sex anymore. She was definitely on guard. Tbh, she was a tad angry at me. When we got inside things were a bit more calm and she told me that years ago she had surgery down there cause of bacteria and it’s taken a super long time to get comfortable sharing this info and her private part with someone. Her now gyno has given her a new salve for it, and she noted cause of this summer her body took a hit with eating a lot of carbs and yeast. She also said that it never always was that smell and that it will take some time for her vagina to get a “normal” scent.
I totally understand where shes coming from now. It wasn’t such a pleasant night as it brought up a lot of past things for her and I needed to deal with the backlash of her triggers and tears. All I wanted was to know what was up and I get it that it’s not something a woman wants to share right off the bat meeting someone but I was legit concerned and curious to know what was up and if there’s something she could do to better it. At the moment shes not looking to see any doctor as she hasn’t had many good doctor moments but I do believe her that her diet and what she eats does have an affect down there. Thanks everyone for your input, it really did help/push me to ask this difficult question to her. I do feel relieved for saying it cause it was going to destroy me mentally if I didn’t say anything.
34 comments
Do you have previous experience or is this the first vagina you’ve come in contact with. I’m just wondering if the issue could be that you’re just sensitive to smells.
Ask her to shower before sex. Or bathe with her and make it romantic.
Smelling “off” is not particularly descriptive. Can you be more specific. Vaginosis often has a very distinct fishy smell. Certain foods can also have distinct smell or taste. It’s helpful to rule out if it’s pathogenic, dietary or something else.
If she I really had bacterial vaginosis putting some over-the-counter cream on it is not going to do it she should’ve went to the doctor and got pills. She’s probably got a really bad infection at this point you should say really nicely that you still notice it and you think she should go to the gynecologist if you can’t tell your girlfriend that you shouldn’t be together!
She might have a UTI. My wife can’t feel when she gets UTIs and she’s prone to get them, but the smell of her vagina changes in a bad way. Not horrible but definitely off putting. She’s definitely understanding when I bring it up cause it’s mostly always a UTI. Only has happened 2 times in the 6 years we’ve been together though.
If it’s very strong and fishy, it’s likely BV or a yeast infection.
If it just has a musk to it, that’s very normal. Vaginas don’t smell like rainbows and sunshine, and it’s very likely just how she smells naturally.
Why’s she using a cream? She should simply see a gyna that’s probably just BV which is easily treatable.
It may seem shallow but I have broken up with otherwise good relationships because the smell was not good to me and i couldn’t see continuing on. It isn’t always that it smells bad but HER SMELL is off putting and to some one else her smell may be amazing.
What kind of cream? If she’s using a cream for a yeast infection or some sort of scented “cleaning” kind of cream there’s a good chance she’s disrupting her vaginal environment. Has she seen a doctor?
She needs to go to the doctor. Not just throw cream on it. Tell her if she doesn’t deal with it you can’t be with her 🤷♀️.
OP; has she had any std tests done?
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She needs to see a doc – smelling like that isn’t normal and she needs to get that sorted.
She absolutely, positively, needs to go to the doctor. What you’ve described in the comments sounds like bacterial vaginosis and it can cause pelvic inflammatory disease if left untreated.
if it’s not her natural smell she would notice it too, ask her
Bro definitely do not just ignore this, she’s choosing not to do anything about it or take it seriously and it’s genuinely disgusting that someone would not care about you having to experience this. Tell her in a more firm manner that you’ve been getting uninterested in sex because of her disregard of the subject, if she continues to never change, then personally I’d consider someone’s hygiene to be a dealbreaker, up to you though.
You need to tell her she needs to see her OBGYN. Having an infection that long could damage her. You could lead with that, You’re worried about her health. I can’t imagine she doesn’t notice?! I’m always surprised when women don’t realize they don’t smell right. I would be mortified and making an emergency appointment asap if my partner told me I smelled bad ESPECIALLY more than once.
“sweetie, I love you, but your va-jay-jay smells like low tide, and you probably should see a doc”
Yeast infection medicine
She should see a doctor if it’s essentially been going on since you’ve known her. It could BV or an STI – a quick google search showed me a few different STI’s that can have virtually no symptoms but the cause of a “fishy smell” and can lie dormant before causing issues. You mentioned it makes you smell which leads me to believe you probably aren’t using protection – maybe you should both be tested for your safety as well.
She needs to see a doctor. The over the counter creams (cleansing douches whatever) usually make the problem better. Have a conversation when you’re NOT having sex. Offer to come and support her while at the doctors. If it is BV, ignoring it can cause even more complications.
Until diagnosed the issue; i would avoid having PIV incase whatever shes got going on, could be transmitted to yourself.
She needs to go to the doctor instead of fobbing this off. This is annoying to me, if my vagina smells I do everything I can to fix it. She probably has BV if it smells that bad. Cream won’t do anything she needs meds. You are absolutely doing nothing wrong here and she needs to grow up and go to the doc. I wouldn’t have sex with her until she goes and sorts it out. If she won’t do that then I would be moving on.
I’ve seen your comments now and it sounds like BV, gross, if she has that and she’s not interested in getting rid of it then there’s something wrong with her. To smell that strongly and not be bothered is gross. It should be grossing her out too it’s not like she can’t smell it
If you still want to have sex with her, say it kindly:
That lotion hasn’t worked, I’m very concerned for your health and possibly my own. I’m not sure it’s anything contagious but I’m concerned there is something going on that might require antibiotics. To be on the better safe than sorry side, will you please go get examined by a doctor?
She should see a gynecologist. They’ll figure it out quickly.
Real talk time. She needs to go to a doctor or you’re out. It’s obviously a sensitive topic but it’s also something she can fix pretty easily.
>She also said she has this cream that would better the smell.
I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that this is probably an over the counter product advertised as vaginal health (a smell good product that targets insecurities over natural smells).
If that’s what that is, it could very well be causing the smell, which is probably a vaginal health issue. She needs to stop putting shit on or in her vagina that isn’t perscribed by a doctor or made for sex (e.g. lube, condoms, etc).
Vaginas aren’t meant to be bombarded with chemicals. It’s a delicate ecosystem that really only requires warm water, or unscented gentle soap at the most, to clean/maintain.
you can’t force a grown adult to better their own hygiene mate.
you’ve told her.. give her a little time to either fix it, or drop her if it’s still not taken seriously on her behalf.
What’s the smell like ? If it is BV, and she doesn’t get it treated it can lead to worse issues such as infertility.
It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Sure the smell sucks, but you can get it from ANYTHING. I’ve gotten it from bubble baths, new sex partner , going from raw -to condoms – to raw again….
Just tell her that her vagina is suppose to smell like a vagina not scented creams and not fishy , and that douching and creams only make things worse …tell her that you aren’t trying to be an asshole but you like sex if the smell is right and you’ve been around enough to know something is off , that it could be a std sti or what have you , tell her that you’re also going to get checked because at this point truthfully you could have something ….either way you both need to be checked and handle the issue , so that you both can enjoy sex cause honestly if you smelled like that , it would be off putting to her and if it’s that bad there’s no way she doesn’t smell it during sex too….
Doctor here. Agree with other posts to see a gyn. Try this approach – “hey sweetie, I care about you and I’m worried that the smell may be an indicator of something else going on. For me, can you at least go get a swab/check to ease my mind? Even if it comes back negative that’s great”. When she goes to the office they will do a history and physical and those gyns have so much experience that they will know what to do immediately. Luckily treatment for it is usually pretty simple too if it is an infection. Many women are mostly asymptomatic other than the smell as well.
putting anything on youre vagina isnt okay, from summers eve to feminine wipes, it actually can make the smell worse and the taste… using only water is the safest and best way (or unsented soap) to clean. also NOTHING should be going inside the vagina (like soap, or summers eve products).
But yall do know that vaginas have a smell right? You also know that your penis can throw off our PH balance. And be the cause of some of these infections?
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You’re much more likely to get BV from a new partner. So ironically it could be you that triggered it. I had it recently for the first time after I had a baby. Hormone imbalance can trigger it. It worth saying this is an imbalance of bacteria. It’s not going to make anyone sick. Obviously it’s not a pleasant smell. Your sperm will be making this worse. Sperm reduces the acidity in the vagina. Which makes it more likely for fishy smelling bacteria to grow. There are lots of products available to help with this. Antibiotics aren’t always the best because they kill all bacteria the good as well. This means it’s a race to repopulate and bad bacteria can win again. Try using stuff that promotes good bacteria.
I use boric acid vaginal suppositories every once in a while just cause my partner and I don’t always use protection and he finishes in me and that can mess up the ph level, they’re also good for BV and the occasional yeast infection
I was in the same situation as you when I was younger. Was with this girl for 7 months and I told her a few times that the smell was off but she didn’t wanna go see a doctor. 2 years later she told me she got it fixed by going to see a doctor 🤦🏻♂️
You are to be commended for actually telling her. Whereas we see other posts here with men smelling like poop and the gf still going down not knowing how to approach the subject. Yuk! You did well. Here’s your star ⭐️