Hello guys. I need all the help in the world. I’ve started working at this new place and there’s one coworker who has me crazy. I’m 23(f) who just graduated and started working my dream job. He is (43) and has been doing an amazing job. He loves his job and always goes the extra mile. I’ve find myself thinking about the possibility of going out w him and getting to know him more. I want to learn from him and spent as much time as I can w him. However, every time I see him we only have short convos. He is super handsome, single and love kids! Since he is 20 years older than me, which I don’t mind- I don’t know how to bring up a conversation in which I can ask him out. I know we have some things in common but I just don’t know how to approach to him in a way that he knows it’s not like a colleague. What should I do?
Update: thank you all for your advise. I have taken into consideration my job and I’m certain it won’t affect it because there are couples in our job. Thanks to those who said that I should take the first step since he may be more reserved about it or even think I’m not attracted to him. I’ll ask him to grab something to drink next week!
5 comments
Yeah, this isn’t going to lead anywhere good. At 43, that’s cool. But when you’re 43 and he’s 63 and thinking about retiring, that’s less cool. And when you’re 63 and he’s a broken old 83, you’re going to be a carer rather than a partner. So you need to ask yourself what you’re looking for.
If it’s just a fling, then there’s no harm. He’ll enjoy the hot young woman spending time with him, and you’ll enjoy him. But if you’re dating for something serious, you’re going to struggle when you’ve got such different life expectations.
Don’t shit where you eat. Esp w someone your dads age.
Just ask him out.
But everyone will tell you there’s no future with him. But not every date or relationship has to be about making a future with someone. Sometimes just spending time with someone you appreciate is enough for a while.
That said, it is something to consider. So before you approach it would be best to sort out what you think you want from him ultimately.
You started working your dream job and you’re going to let your feelings for some guy potentially derail your career in the future?
If he had any sense he’d turn you down. Don’t date people you work with, or people with twice your life experience.