My (34f) boyfriend (33m) of 4 months broke up with me 2hrs ago. Im back home now and still shocked. Our relationship has been very rocky, him being very hot and cold, not caring enough and not 100% not commiting to me.
2 days ago he introduced me to his 2 bestfriends, we had a good time felt like our relationship was definitely going to a very serious path, i was very happy and the last 3 weeks has been the best so far thats why im so shocked he broke up with me.. Yesterday he all of a sudden changed, it was night and day, he was trying to avoid me and just weird around me and wasnt physically affectionate with me.. I asked him whats going on, he said nothing and its all in my head, but it was obvious that something was happening..
This morning, we had a little bit of misunderstanding. He left and went to gym and after an hour he went back and he told me.
“I cant do this with you.. you need someone who is a communicator, i will never be that person, my heart is not in it.. i didnt mean to string you along bec. I really wanted to see where this is going but everything is so rushed and it feels forced.”
I looked at him and I wanted to cry but i chosed to say.. “theres nothing I can do to make you want me the way I wanted you, I have tried my best.. Ive heard enough and its okay..
I then gathered all of my courage to have a straight face, unfriended and blocked him on social medias, stood up and packed my things and now im back in my house.
Now im wondering, is there really nothing there for him? Like did he meant he never liked me at all? I feel so used and so hurt. The rejection was too much, i feel so worthless. Was he wanting to break up for so long or was he waiting for me to break up and since i wasnt doing it, he just did it.
Im sorry, im such a mess right now and im so hurt and confused. I will miss him terribly, he has been a vital part of my life in the last 4 months..
TL;dr: My bf of 4 months broke up with me after having the best weeks of our relationship and after introducing me to his bestfriends.
3 comments
I’m really sorry OP, but it sounds like it’s for the best. He probably does have feelings for you, but he clearly has some baggage of his own to sort out. The fact that you’re describing your *4 month relationship* as being “rocky” tells me it wasn’t healthy from the start, usually if you’re both ready and willing to have a new partner that’s the phase that should be exciting and fun, not “rocky”. So he probably isn’t quite ready.
Sucks, but what can you do.
I can see that you are hurting terribly. You say you are confused so you need time to process. Of course he loved you and you loved him but now is the time for processing not just moving on. Recognize your needs, treat your self and see that you can be perfectly fine on your own.
> Like did he meant he never liked me at all?
Take what he said at face value. He tried but it didn’t work for him, and he can tell he’s not the kind of guy that can make you happy. That’s all there is to it, and it has nothing to do with your worth. Besides, if he intended to use you, he would have handled this whole thing differently and not been honest about how he feels and what he’s bringing to the table. Objectively, this was a four month rocky relationship between two incompatible people that thankfully didn’t drag on long enough to cause severe damage. Let yourself grieve and focus on moving on.