“Desired” but Not Valued?

Hello!

I’m a 23F & I seem to have a problem getting guys who want to get to know me. While it’s not uncommon to find a guy who’s “physically interested” (which I don’t think is hard for any girl on the planet) none ever want to take me on dates. Usually the only ones that approach me are very crass & rude & won’t even take me on a date.

I recently did have ONE, but he followed up his date request by saying I was “hot hot” and he “thinks of me when he’s hormonal & horny.” I’m not that attractive. I’m 50lbs overweight (though shapely), I don’t dress super stylish, and I hardly wear makeup because I don’t have the time. I had another, and he basically avoided me the entire time we were at the movies together. Plus, all of my less conventionally attractive friends get way more/better attention that I do. They get dates & favors while I’m treated like I’m not there. (Not to say they shouldn’t get any or the guys should like me instead— I’m happy for them! It’s just I never get any & I don’t understand what’s so wrong with me.) This also extends to meeting other people in day to day life— like an employee will joke with my friend & not me. I know I’m awkward sometimes, but I always try to be pleasant. These are the results even when I try to be outgoing. And though people may say “insecurity” is the answer, some of them are obviously insecure themselves yet still get that treatment.

Anyways, the only guys that talk to me are the guys who want to use me & don’t see me as a person worth value or respect OR old or homeless men. I’ve never had a real boyfriend, no guy has ever shown interest, and they block me as soon as they know they’re not getting sex. They say this only happens to girls nobody wants. I’ve even had multiple times where guys try to buy/convince me to have sex with them with small favors. They won’t take me on a date, though. Even online, I always get someone going out of their way to put down my looks.

I’ve seen all kinds of people get attention, so I’m not going to ask too much about my looks, but my main question is why might this be happening? I approach every situation with enthusiasm, and only reference the past as a learning experience to look out for warning signs of manipulation. I know I’m smart & funny & have a lot to offer that would make me a good partner, so I’m not sure why I’m completely rejected by everyone all the time. It’s really getting to my self esteem to see everyone around me get effort and attention while I’m constantly ignored. I know there are guys out there willing to put in effort, I just wish they liked me. If there’s something I could do better, or if anyone else has this problem and fixed it, I would be happy to learn anything I can. I would really appreciate any advice.