my bestie feels I’m directing someone else’s anger on her

My bestie(21F) hates this other guy in my class, let’s call him Jack(24M) and she has all the reasons to do so. Jack has lots of traits that are not considered of good merit and I have no reason to defend him in any case. He acts rude, passes misogynistic comments and abuses on a regular basis. That’s also why he has a very small circle of friends. However, he behaves normally in front of me and his small friend circle. He has also said that he respects me a lot and he won’t ever misbehave with me.

I’m not so close with Jack as he claims to be with me, and I have expressed this to him as well in a very polite manner. His reply was that he is fine with it as long as we are friends as he rarely trusts anyone around him. He has made almost everyone his enemy and I am the only person he talks normally on a daily basis.

I had no issues with him, until last few months when I felt that he started feeling jealous about how much time I spend with my bestie and not with him. I also noticed that he started making efforts to try talk and be friends with my bestie and be a part of the friend circle I mostly spend my time with. However, I share mostly everything with my bestie and they aren’t all so interested in talking to people who has the thought process similar to Jack. I can’t actually blame them as most of my friends are girls and Jack being a misogynist with his mentality brings few really awkward moments in discussion. I have been told multiple times to cut my ties with Jack but he had never misbehaved with me until recently.

Since Jack sensed that my friends weren’t so approving of him, he started making taunts and derogatory jokes on them calling them names when he was talking to me later. I immediately shut him down saying he didn’t have the need nor the right to say anything like that. He immediately started laughing saying it was all a joke, but he continued that behaviour for a long time. This made me actually realise that maybe I have to stop talking to him at least to keep my mental sanity.

I’m an extroverted person, and it’s difficult for me to cut someone off so rapidly. So I said that I’m trying to stop talking to Jack but by taking small steps. And in all honesty I did. But those steps continued to trigger him as I had accepted. Jack, being the irrational person he is, sent me a long WhatsApp msg filled with abuses towards me, my friends and my family. I had reached my threshold and was really pissed off. I gave him a whole hearted reply and blocked him forever.

When I talked about this incident to my friends, they laughed about it saying I should have done it much sooner and the fact that I’ll probably unblock him again and start talking to him. My bestie asked for my phone to read the chats, it’s something we usually do on a common basis and I didn’t mind it at all. In fact I was kinda happy that at least they were taking it lightly as that might help me take my mind off the topic. When I asked for my phone back, she just ignored my request and started reading my chats to everyone there laughing at it. I asked for it back and she again ignored me, this time stretching her arm so to keep the phone out of my reach. At last I lost my patience and shouted to give me back my phone. We were at a cafe, there weren’t many people but almost everyone there heard me. She then blamed me for not blocking Jack earlier and insulting her in front of everyone. I apologized to her, as she really matters to me and said her that the reason I shouted wasn’t related to Jack, it was due to her behaviour at that moment. I do realise my behaviour was very wrong and can’t be excused, I wanted her to realise I was very anxious at that moment with all going on.

She then blamed me for not solving the Jack issue before and also said that I would probably start talking to Jack again. This led to a 2 day fight. I said it could have been avoided if she simply handed over the phone to me, but she claims I’m just shifting Jacks blame on her.

I really have no idea what to do. Help me out here.