So I’ve noticed I have difficulty speaking straight, when I have like 4 pairs of eyes trained on me when I’m talking or telling a story within a group.
I think it started when I joined a social event early this year (1st time in a long time since the pandemic). The people there were very outgoing and extroverted. They can straight up strike a conversation with anyone and everyone, and eventually they formed their own groups chatted the night away. I mean I can be pretty chatty but not in the same level as them. By then, I was really demoralized and wanted to just run away, but I couldn’t since I was driving 3 people home later that night.
Since then, my thoughts sometimes trail back to that night and replay my failures there, and later I’ve develop this fear of joining social events.
Fast forward around to July, finally hung out with my college friends again (first time in a while), that’s when I realized I’d freeze up and stutter the first few words whenever I got the attention of the group. That’s when I was starting to get worried.
I’m not sure how to close this wall of text, but I guess
TL:DR
I joined social event in February, got demoralized by the extroverts there. Developed social anxiety, and I freeze up and stutter a bit when people are listening to me speak.
3 comments
From what I’ve heard from this subreddit is to keep practicing and keep pushing yourself to go out of your comfort zone as the hardest step is commonly the first few. It may also help to think about what you are going to say before you say it. I.e formulate your response in your head and just say that as this helped me in the past. Hope the advice helps!
Meditate! It will help keep your focus on what you are saying and not the reaction’s of your peers! Pick, one person in the group and pretend you are only speaking to that individual! This began happening to me after bombing an ill prepared speech in high school. Don’t take yourself to seriously and don’t be afraid to pause to gather your thoughts. People allow others much more time to respond than they allow themselves. Just be confident in what you’re saying.
I was *just* thinking about using online chatting to practice social skills and small talk.