Not sure if I’m the bad guy here, but I feel like I might have been. So I met this nice, chill cute dude on tinder. He had told me that he had casually fucked around. after hanging out two days, I realized I didn’t feel any romantic attraction towards him and I told him that.
I said how I just wanted to sleep together and cuddle. He said how he emotionally wasn’t attached and didn’t have feelings either for me (he was kinda dry when texting beforehand so I think it could be true), but at the same time he told me how he felt hurt being used like a body pillow.
I feel shitty now….I am confused if I just approached tinder the wrong way by assuming he would be fine with whatever I wanted since he was into casual stuff. This is my first time meeting someone on tinder. I thought people on tinder just use each other mostly??
7 comments
It’s for whatever people want to use it for. He sounds like he was just looking for something to whine/complain about
Um, no. Don’t use people
“Casual” is a massive umbrella term that means a lot of things. So if you’re looking for a cuddling partner and that’s it, I’d put that on your bio and be more upfront about it.
Casual mode isnt for everyone.
You’ll find all types on tinder tbh. Surprisingly, even the ones who just want to get their rocks off are capable of human emotion XD I’d bet in the casual scene theres lots of FWB couples that conclude with someone catching feelings and the other not.
>he told me how he felt hurt being used like a body pillow
Don’t feel shitty. You made it clear what you wanted (just to bang and cuddle, no strings attached) and he’s expressing his opinion about that.
Just tell him goodbye and good luck, and find someone else. There are a literal ton of guys looking for NSA fun on Tinder, who won’t have the same issues as this guy.
You didn’t use him. He’s just hurt that you rejected him first. Don’t worry about it.
Even when people have the intention of doing something casual it’s not outside the bounds of reality that they might develop feelings.
If you both went into it with the same understanding of it being casual, then you’ve done nothing wrong. In fact you communicating how you feel it’s EXCELLENT because so many people would have just ghosted.
You did right by him, his feeling shot a bit hurt, that’s life. You’re fine.