I was thinking about some couples who grow old and have been in their relationship for decades but never care about how each other look. Some people are really pretty when they are young but age really fast and some stay beautiful forever. What are your thoughts? When do looks not factor in anymore?
20 comments
Looks don’t matter any more when you are in love.
when the rest of the relationship becomes irreplaceable. some couples get there quick, some never do.
When he wants a serious relationship it doesn’t matter. My first girlfriend was my first gf because she is a quality genuinely good woman. I still am in love with her. We broke up due to moving away, we keep in touch.
However she’s not very pretty. I didn’t mind that. It’s not exactly the most important thing about her anyways.
Looks should be at the bottom of the list for traits to look for in a marriage partner.
When you put God at the center of your marriage
My answer is different than the rest. In real life looks matter. Thats the first thing you notice about a person and that indicates sexual chemistry (its hard to have good sex with someone you arent attracted to).
Two people growing old together is not the same as one partner ballooning up to 400lbs or letting their body go to shit. You can still look very good when youre older if you take care of yourself.
One thing I love about my gf is that she takes care of her self very well. She always smells good and is very clean. If she stopped doing that that’s going to be a big problem.
When you’ve already been with them for a long time and gotten to see them change. The the person they are and what they bring to the relationship are what is important.
Those guys just gave up trying to get laid and started eating bro
In the dark.
It’s all subjective. If someone’s physicality changes and your feelings for them change then was it really a meaningful relationship?
Beauty is subjective so what you might find an 8, someone else might see a 5.
When I’m not interested.
Overly technical answer:
In the presence of vaginal secretions men lose the ability to distinguish levels of attractiveness.
Basically everyone becomes a 10.
https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/1474704916643328
When the man’s ugly himself
Reality is, when you first meet I think it almost always matters. It did when I met my wife.
But I believe that in a strong relationship, it becomes less and less important every year. I’m at a point where if my wife was disfigured by a disability or age, it wouldn’t make one bit of difference anymore. I just don’t want any version of a world without her.
Looks attract and personality makes you stay. If you’ve gotten to know a person, you’ll love them even when they grow ugly.
When a good character is being provided
Physical attraction works to attract, but once you’re in love you’re not re-checking that box. You’re keeping that original image in your mind and blending it slightly with reality.
Growing old feels more different and natural. That’s still the same woman and my memory of what she looked like and what we did when we were young would still heavily affect how I see her at 70. She would still be that young woman to me.
This also means that I won’t have as strong of an affect if I had met her at 40 vs 20.
It always does