We’ve passed though some kind of manipulation Stage where she asked me to take distance from any female friend. She’s taking therapy but there’s still some complicated situations, today is one of my best friends birthday and since she’s a woman my girlfriend says she will go with me but she obviously wouldn’t be comfortable, even though my friend will be with her boyfriend.
I told her a week ago I would go even if she doesn’t want to go with me and because it’s a close friend and she said “it hurts that you say that knowing how I feel”.
It’s really hard to overcome this situations because once she made a nightmare for me when we went to another female friend’s party, she would act like she’s mad at me and want me to take her home ASAP. I will go with her today, but, what should I do if she starts acting like she’s angry and complicating a moment that should be just fun with friends?
She never does anything that will make others see she’s angry, she only acts like that with me.
TL;DR: My insecure GF would ruin fun moments at any event related to female friends and I don’t know how to act when she starts acting angry.
5 comments
Why are you with her if she mistreats you? You say she is in therapy, but it doesn’t sound like she admitted she was the problem, nor made any agreements for how to protect you from her. If she were willing to work on this,, you could give her a reminder when she starts acting poorly and she could start using anti-anxiety coping mechanisms to decrease her distress. But if she thinks it’s okay to abuse you, how is the relationship ever supposed to work? Have you discussed this with her?
You should break up. This is ridiculously unhealthy and unfair to you. Have your own way to get to and from the party and tell her to leave on her own when she’s ready to leave as you want to see your friends.
It HURTS HER that you are going to your female friend’s birthday? And she’s decided ahead of time that she’ll be uncomfortable? She’s not going to the dentist. This is a birthday party. And now you gotta either go without her and “hurt her,” or take her with and watch her make someone else’s birthday be all about her. She sounds fun.
Unless you are leaving out major things (like you and Friend used to date), your GF is overreacting.
Wait.
>She put an hour ago on her WhatsApp’s info “I hope death takes me”
THAT is her reaction to a birthday party? What does she post when she has a funeral to go to??
If she acts out send her home stay at the party. At this point the more you enable her controlling behavior the more she will try and control you because she doesn’t know how to self soothe her anxiety.
She thinks she owns you op. Cut her loose.