Alright let me try to keep this short. I need advice on what to do since this has been bothering me and I can’t figure it out. I’m in a 3 year relationship with my gf. She visited her high school friend (m22) in another city over the spring break; they’ve been really close platonic friends for 10 years or so.
She comes back and tells me that her friend tried to kiss her and she pulled back and they laughed it off. She’s only worried now since she couldn’t believe her long-time friend pulls that shit on her risking their friendship—fair enough.
A few days later i heard from a mutual friend (F21 let’s call her Alicia) of my gf and I that turns out they made out several times and it was mutual. She mentions that my gf has no regrets, even goes off to say that he’s a good kisser and so forth.
I have lost my trust with my girlfriend and really want to break it off. The caveat is that Alicia does not want my gf to know that she told me about all that. Alicia’s not ready to lose her friendship with my gf. I really have no other reason for a break up besides what Alicia told me; yet I can’t even bring it up.
TLDR: heard from a friend that my gf made out with another guy but i can’t use it to confront my gf 🙁
Please Reddit do your magic 🥺
11 comments
Just say you don’t feel the same anymore. You might look like an asshole but what can you do? It’s better to put the blame on yourself. If she gives you shit and calls you out. Tell her the real reason. Alicia might hate you but your self respect should come first before others feelings. My advice
You don’t need a reason to breakup. Not wanting to be with her anymore is enough. And you can tell her that.
You don’t really need a reason…but I’d probably say something along the lines of “I know what you did on spring break”
So let me get this straight…she tells you, expects you to just stay with a cheater and be tormented with those thoughts of her cheating and lying to you because SHE decided to tell you for whatever reason but she can’t stand to lose her friend? What kind of sense does that make? Unless she’s lying to you and purposely fucking with your head? Which is pretty sadistic.
Man, I’d be going to your girlfriend yesterday to sort this out and I’d let her friend know she’s a real POS for expecting you to just stay quiet. You have no reason to protect her friend. You don’t owe her anything.
Tell her you’ve begun to find her unattractive and boring (or just a poor fit), that you’ve been coming to terms with this for some time, perhaps over the past year and that you’ve been putting on a front, and that you no longer think it’s fair to her for you to stick with her now that you’ve realized you have no intention of pursuing a serious future with her. Finish it off by saying “it’s not you, it’s me” or “I’m sorry but I just don’t love you anymore if I ever really did.”
EDIT: Try investigating this further. Is your gf still friends with the guy? Is Alice close with the guy? Who else was at the party?
are we supposed to convince you to break up? not sure what exactly you are looking for here but you can just tell your gf you know the truth and are ending it without it coming out who told you.
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Tf if she cheated on you then say something
Is there any proof to Alicia’s statements? If not, I would ask your gf to come clean as you got an anonymous message from someone saying there is more to this story. Ask her if she’s ready to cut the guy out. If she says yes, you should be fine. If not, break up.
You are more concerned about their friendship than your mental health dude. Cut the crap and break up.
You don’t need a reason. Relationships end. Tell her this relationship has run its course. This is the truth. She cheated and didn’t tell you. You don’t have to tell her you know she cheated.