How do I ask for affection?

2 comments

1. You communicate how you’re feeling.

   Like: “Hey, I’m feeling [xyz] because of [abc]. I was wondering if it would be possible to spend more time together/etc.”

   Or: “I really appreciate it when you [xyz]. It makes me feel really great. Do you think we could do that more?”

2. I think the question you actually asking is “How do I hint that I want more affection without directly asking for it ?”

   If that’s what you’re looking for – then the solution is pretty simple.

   1) Hint at affectionate activities. Encourage your partner to see them.

   2) Emphasize the value on affection in others. One of the most effective ways you can round the way ask without asking is find an example of an ideal couple, find something affectionate, and tell your partner “you see this – I want that.”

   3) Prioritize affection as important order in your day. Basically it if were a word in a sentence make it **bold.** People tend to remember the most exciting and thte last thing said in an exchange. Say it at night.

   Whether or not any of these works for you and your partner depends on how good your partner is at “picking up what you put down.” If you guys read each other frequently – shouldnt be a problem. If not – these might not work.

   Try the above context cues way first , but if they dont get it after 1 or 2 tries, use your words. Go straight to the point. After all of the above youll at least have a story of what youve already tried to accompany your request when you get to it , which will “soften” the ask.