Is it at all rude to skip a wedding for close family member

8 comments

1. Mmm. Not rude. You are busy. They should understand. But I have skipped weddings before because of money or because I was busy, and I am not close to those people anymore. In retrospect whatever it was I did instead of going to the wedding was not important.

   Even if the bride and groom don’t have time to talk to you it will mean a lot that you came. I am sure they wouldn’t hold it against you, but they may remember you more fondly if you go because it means they were more important to you than whatever else it was you could have done that weekend.

2. Depends on if you already told them you’d come and how close you are to them.

   If you told them you’d come but change plans not because of something totally unavoidable like sickness, then yes. If you’re super close to them, I’d also just go anyway and find me time somewhere else.

   If you’re not too close, feel free to cite work but still give a nice wedding gift to show your sincerity. That’s what I’d do, at least.

3. Send them a card with cash and they’ll be just fine without you being there.

4. Yes, modern expectations are that you should attend the wedding of close friends and family; especially if there are no major difficulties for no-show.

   “Skipping” isn’t an option.

   Getting excused by your close family member is the next adult level thing to do. They need to be clear that they are ok with you flaking. Also run it past your parents as they probably still feel they have some say in your life.

   Adulting would be sucking it up and attending, trying to have some fun and connecting with family.

5. They will be hurt if you don’t show up at all. I recommend going for at least part of the wedding. You can always make up an excuse and leave early if you aren’t enjoying yourself.

6. My sister ditched our cousins wedding because she wanted to do meth instead. Lol it is understandable to miss the wedding. You don’t even have to explain to them why. I would just let them know you aren’t able to make it and offer seeing them a different time to “make up” for it. They should understand people have lives and shouldn’t be upset you aren’t going as I highly doubt you will be the only one invited that is not in attendance. You do what you need to do. If someone told me they couldn’t come to my wedding I would understand and not press for anymore information. It’s nice to be there for them for support but not a necessity.

7. Suck it up, and go. That’s the mature thing to do and the one choice you won’t regret in retrospect, however nice not going seems that afternoon.

8. If they’re a close family member and you don’t have an unavoidable reason you can’t attend (like being sick etc), then yes, it’d be rude.

   You can still not attend just don’t expect people to show up to important events for you if you’re not going to show up to important events for them because you want ‘me time’