I’m almost 30, no dating experience, no confidence, no matches in online dating, and rarely meet women in real life. Recently put my pictures up on Photofeeler and they did pretty good, but that only makes me understand this less. And it’s not like I drive women away with my personality because they don’t even get close enough to see that. I just feel unwanted and alone, and like there are no options for me. I’ve tried working on myself, tried therapy, tried going back to school, tried making friends, tried moving, but nothing ever makes a difference. I just end up alone again without even coming close, and it’s so frustrating feeling like I have no control over any of this.
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Well you’ve worked on yourself and that is invaluable and although it may not pay off now, it will.
As for dating… You say you’ve worked on yourself. Have you invested in learning about how attraction works?
You say you have no confidence, so I wonder if maybe it’s the way you carry yourself in person that isn’t necessarily the most attractive to other people. You can be physically attractive, but I have seen many a guy I find physically attractive carry themselves in ways that are turn-offs (ex. making themselves small, not interacting with others in a group setting, etc).
I am also wondering what photos you put up. Were they regular, everyday you, or were they when you may have dressed up more for a party or event? Could it be possible your everyday style/haircut/etc isn’t necessarily the most flattering but when you dress up, you look great?
Can you link you DM your tinder profile?
In basically the exact same situation. But I have confidence in myself. Although it’s the same thing people never want to get to know me.
Damn same man. I feel like a lot of us are in this boat rn.
Are you a virgin? And are you more interested in dating rn or in sex? Serious questions.
Send me your dating profiles and I’ll see if I can help you out.
Are you tall?
Do you have a good job/make good money?
Do you dress well?
Are you relaxed and funny around women?
Do you work out regularly?
Have you tried women in the 30 -35 range?
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If the answer to all these questions is yes, I got nothing for you. If the honest answer is no, then now you have an answer and potentially something to work on, depending on which one was the no answer.
have you thought about talking to a therapist to find out more? Its not taboo really and its super cheap if you have health insurance. I have happily married friend who talks to her therapist weekly just to iron things out from relationships, job, stress, whatever. Maybe you just need someone you can vent your frustration on and get some feedback.
Like others mentioned, dm them your profile see if it is that issue. But I feel online profile “swipes” are mostly superficial anyway.
You are doing something wrong, your profile is bad or you do not present yourself well.