My ex recorded audio of us having sex before I left town (without me knowing)

Pretty much as the title says above.

We spent a week together before I left town to live in another state. We were having sex and such, and to me, it was sort of a goodbye. Nothing bad happened, we were having sex, eating together and gaming together and that.

Last night we were having a sexting session with me sending a nude (nothing that could really pull back to me). I mentioned something like “I wish we had nudes together”, and he mentioned that he had a recording of us having sex. Obviously, I was like “Huh?”, because I didn’t say anything about agreeing to that.

He mentioned that it was “only for him”, and “his reasons were justified and he did nothing wrong”. But he also knows its not consensual. If he had of said something about it right after the encounter, I think I would have been okay with it, but like… the fact he mentioned it close to three weeks after makes me feel icky.

I don’t know if I’m just feeling this way for no good reason… I am unsure if it can be put back onto me unless he tags me or whatever. But it also makes me feel caged – where if I say something wrong he might release it. I just feel… gross. I don’t know. It’s one thing for me to be sending him nudes, but it’s another for him to be recording me without asking.

I sort of went quiet with him after that, obviously – then I asked if he was keeping a cache of his previous ex’s nudes and such (I know he’s kept some of mine that I sent to him). I deleted his stuff whenever we had arguments as it was morally wrong on my end to keep anything, but hes kept most things of our four year relationship. But I also feel hypocritical because I sent him a nude last night (prior to me learning of the existence of this audio).

Ugh… I just don’t know what to do, or to say.