Hi all my partner is a busyyy man. I understand of course but at the same time it’s effecting me and it’s effecting how I feel in bed. We are still fairly new not super new but it’s been like a couple months.
I feel like we pretty much only have sex. I want more talk time or spending time outside of bed time. But he has classes and work all in the same day 7 days a week and it usually takes alll day. So I only see him at night usually and you know he’s usually exhausted and the only thing we can do as small talk and sex.
The reason I say this is effecting me is cause I’m a overthinker and I feel like it’s harder to communicate when I feel like we don’t have as much communication outside of the bedroom.
It’s really upsetting 🙁
I was hoping to get some advice on things we could do or something I can do to get closer to him…cause it’s effecting my sex performance and our relationship.
It’s Halloween month and probably won’t be doing anything with him besides spooky sex 🎃
6 comments
There is really only 2 possible routes on this one – either he makes more time in his life for actual relationships or it stays as status quo and you decide where to go from there.
Have you mentioned to him that you’d like more time with him outside of time in bed?
You need to talk to him about how you’re feeling. Pretty much exactly what you said here. Possibly something like:
“Hey, I know you’re really busy and while I can understand that, I feel like it’s impacting our relationship, at least on my end. I feel like we only have sex and don’t get much quality time together. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy our sex, but I find it harder to connect and grow as a couple together when we don’t talk much outside of the bedroom. Do you think there is any way we can find a better balance for us?”
Honestly you either need to accept that this will be life for a little while and be grateful that he is working so hard to build a better life or move along and let someone else. Whatever you do don’t put yourself in between him and his goals
Was he this busy before you came along? So you don’t work and you just stay home?
While many of the comments say to communicate this, I agree with but I think it’ll do a lot of good to try and think of some solutions to present to gin instead of just brainstorming them with the hopes he’ll have the answer because if he’s as tired as you say he is, the last thing he’s gonna want to do is think of more things to schedule.
i assume he was the one who asked you out, hit on you