How do you feel about “splitting the bill” on dates/ relationship?

33 comments

  2. I think it’s the right way, I mean sometimes it’s okay if one person wants to pay it all but it shouldn’t be expected or accepted to happen always.

  4. I’d prefer splitting on a first and probably second date. After a couple of dates or so, I’d prefer us taking turns planning the dates and thus also taking turns paying. Always splitting would be and feel horrible, I don’t like people who are stingy with money.

    In a long-ish term relationship, I wouldn’t care as long as it didn’t get completely one-sided with one party constantly paying for the other.

  7. That’s my preference, I can never remember who’s turn it is and if we’re doing different things, it could end up uneven. I don’t find it problematic either, every place I’ve been to (I’m in the UK), you just say “I’ll pay x, they’ll pay y” and they let you split it that way.

  8. I always offer to split the bill, they almost never accept. I’ve been dating someone for a couple months and I expected us to take turns paying or something but he never lets me pay… In all fairness he makes much much more than I do (also I have not been working for the past month due to taking my internship ending and waiting to start my ft job) but it’s hard for me to accept as it makes me feel unequal to him.

  10. That’s a good preference for teen couples and couples who just started dating. After having some dates you can figure out how you would like to do it with your partner. But for me when someone pays for me it feels so uncomfortable and pretty nice at the same time

  11. Everytime i’ve been on a date I offer to pay for myself, but they insist they’ve got it. I’m young, everyone i’ve dated has been broke college students so it just makes me feel awful when they spend money on me bc it could better be spent on groceries.

    I just suggest free or cheap dates now bc I’ve found offering to pay kind of insults them. My last first date I went to a museum which was free, and i’ve had dinner dates at mcdonald’s before lol. It makes me feel better.

  12. I’m not against in general! However in my relationship, my partner tends to pay 99% of the time because, 1, he makes twice as much as I do, and 2, he orders a FUCK ton of food and alcohol and/or the fanciest thing on the menu which I am not very equipped to fund lol. So he pays so that he can have what he wants. But I treat him for his birthday or if I happen to be in a comfy financial spot at the moment.

  13. We generally just take turns. We don’t necessarily keep track of who paid when, just whoever can/wants to get it that time does.

    Both of us figure that we’re doing life together, and over time there’s varying degrees of give and take in a relationship. It all evens itself out in the end one way or another.

  14. I have never understood the thought of men having to pay. I pay for mine he pays for his and if there are times when the other wants to offer then it’s fine

  15. I like to get the bill on a first date.

    I like to do it because I like to overturn stereotypes, I have enough money, I don’t want any expectation that I might ‘owe’ anything in return and I like spoiling people.

    After that, I prefer to take turns. It feels nice to treat one another, and like you are out as a couple, rather than as two mates.

  16. I always split the bill. I don’t like strangers paying for me and if I date someone for a longer amount of time I still want our spending to be at least roughly equal.

    Also, insisting on splitting a bill is a surprisingly good way to check for some weird and controlling behavior. A few guys I was on a date with started arguing with me about it and did not accept my no. That immediately let me know that they would not respect my decisions in other situations either.

  17. I just want to pay for myself. Occasionally I’ll gift a meal to my SO. But otherwise I want to be able to get what I want and pay accordingly.

  18. I prefer that both pay for what they ordered, especially when dating. In a relationship maybe taking turns if the orders are somewhat equal.

  19. I am okay with that just have turns. But when i dont like the man i am dating (first date) i pay all bill. So since he didnt pay for it he dont think ‘i owe him’

  21. I prefer splitting. Even in a relationship. Because why would you burden someone with 100% of the bill, 50% of the time, when instead you can do 50% 100% of the time?

    Aka, if you buy something for 100 dollars and you pay 50 one month, and 50 the other month, the financial strain is levelled out. It feels like you’re spending less money. But if you buy something for 100 dollars and have to pay upfront, it’s much more of a burden.

    I don’t understand why taking turns is a good thing.

  23. Not against it and doesnt mind it as well. Eversince me and my husband were dating, it just became a non-verbal agreement that whoever planned the date or whoever wants to eat out or who has the extra money to do so will pay for the bill. Though we never really keeps track who paid what or who paid more.

  25. If both partners agree, then I don’t see it being an issue. It’s about communication, especially when money is involved

  26. Me and my boyfriend take turns to pay for dates/food we eat when I visit. The only exceptions are birthdays or celebrating promotions etc where the other person pays entirely

  27. Where I’m from, it’s disrespectful and tasteless for the man even to view this as an option. However, taking turns (paying in full) as the relationship progresses is okay. Everyone thinks differently, so do what works best for both of you and not others.

  28. I feel really awkward if someone I don’t know that well pays something for me so I prefer splitting the bill. At bars I will accept a drink only from interesting guys and I will always pay the next round.

    But in long-term relationship I think the one who has more money pays more often, but it shouldn’t be just one sided, the other one should pay sometimes too.

  29. For a first date, I prefer we pay for our own stuff. Once we’re in a committed relationship, we just take turns.

  30. Take turns or split the bill then and there. He can be chivalrous and treat you like a princess without being an ATM.

  31. Taking turns is great for relationships. It feels like we’re treating each other.

    First date I personally prefer to split but each time (besides once where it was clear there would be no 2nd date) the guy has insisted on paying!

  32. I’d rather take turns rather than splitting. My girlfriend prefers to just pay for everything so I just let her most of the time.

  33. For someone I don’t know well, it’s imperative.

    For someone I do know well, taking turns treating each other is fine.

    For someone who has more restrictive finances than I do, I am happy to treat most of the time.

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