what was the honest harsh truth you needed to hear?

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1. My cats in my home right now won’t be with me anymore by the time I become an adult… Just thinking of that makes me feel so down.

2. That it was time to pick myself back up. That I needed to get out of my head, stop overthinking, and make things happen for myself. To make healthier choices. To start being “me” again. It was the wake up call I needed to snap out of what I became after a series of mental and physical setbacks.

3. Don’t fall in love with potential.

4. It’s really no one else’s responsibility to give me closure, nor is anyone else to blame or is responsible for my unhappiness. It is my responsibility to give myself closure and make myself happy.

5. If I don’t make an effort to reply to/initiate contact with other people, they’ll eventually stop reaching out. It’s very easy to sit around and let others come to me, but that’s not really fair for the person who is trying more.

6. I used to be the picture perfect mom with the picture perfect house, perfect meals, the whole deal. Then one day my husband sat me down and gently told me I was making my family miserable with my impossibly high standards. He was right. We are all much happier with some mess, simple meals and no one losing their mind over a messy bedroom.

7. “Everyone ain’t your friend. Stand up for yourself.” That took me a while to figure out for myself.

8. That if you drop dead right now the world will go on as normal as if nothing happened. Part of maturing as a person is realizing that your existence is inconsequential to almost everyone. Despite this fact, in order to live a good life, you have to not be afraid to take up space in the world.

   So it’s a bit contradicting… your existence doesn’t matter but in order to live, your existence has to matter to YOU. You can’t just give up on life and be all “well nothing really matters” or “I don’t really matter”. Even if you matter only to 1-2 people in the world, you might mean so much to them, that you’ll destroy them if you destroy yourself.

   I used to think having an ego was a bad thing, but now I realize that SOME ego is necessary. You can’t face the bleak indifference of reality without being a little bit delusional and ego-centric.

9. Nobody owes me anything, and I don’t owe anybody anything.

   If I want to give or do something for someone, it’s because I want to. Not from feeling pressured or other obligations. And I wouldn’t want anyone to give or do something for me if they really didn’t want to. They don’t owe me anything.

10. Love isn’t unconditional nor should it be.

11. That I needed to quit my dead end job ,I had been there 18 years and was so burned out yet held on out of fear,finally quit in February and got a better,funner job! I’m finally excited to go to work again👌🏼

12. “All your problems are pretty much your own fault.”

13. That it was ME who had to figure out what I believed in, what I wanted, how I wanted to live. I felt so restricted by my past and the way I was raised, but now I am able to be comfortable with how I view and approach the world physically, emotionally, spiritually, and interpersonally.

14. No one can help you if you don’t start helping yourself.

15. I was lovebombed and none of it was real.

16. My friend said to me, “It’s abuse. It’s fucking abuse.”

    I was 25 and this was in reference to a parent. It changed my life. When a parent is emotionally abusive and you grew up with it, it’s hard to recognize that it isn’t you. She set me free.

17. Your company is not looking out for your best interests.

18. Someone who cheats, is showing exactly how much they respect you.

19. When people show you who they are, believe them. Actions > words

20. You might not find the love of your life, and that’s okay. Happiness comes from within.

21. That your life happens through you, not to you.

    You aren’t a victim of the circumstances as often as you are a victim of your own choices.

    So choose better.

22. Give your love to others freely and unconditionally. Don’t expect or worry about receiving anything in return. Or if what you are giving is enough. Just be comfortable in your own skin with what you can give. Be good with it. And know how to care for yourself and keep yourself safe from leechers or abusers in this regard.

23. “He is a grown man, and no one can *make* him do anything. If he’s not responding, it’s because he is choosing not to”

24. Being prepared for the worst is still self destructive if you aren’t also preparing for the best.

25. If he’s not making it obvious, he doesnt like you

    Men are very clear when it comes to pursuing or courting a woman they want

26. You might have been dealt a bad hand in life, but it’s up to you to get yourself out.

27. Things will never be the same 😕

28. They knew they were hurting you, and they just didn’t care.

29. Being unapologetically yourself isn’t going to work. You do need to learn how to blend, compromise and appeal to the masses. There are times and people to let your guard down around but, that’s private time.