Is it fair to ask what we are without expecting him to say we’re exclusive right now? I’ve been seeing a guy for 5 weeks and things have def been getting more serious. My friend saw he still has his dating app. I still have mine but I haven’t had an interest in checking it.
I want to ask if things continue to be good and we progress at a healthy pace, is this potentially going to lead to a serious commitment? I don’t know how to ask that without seeming clingy or like I want an official title right now.
I am an anxious person, and having peace of mind about this would set me at ease, but I don’t want to ruin things by seeming too intense or eager.
13 comments
Ok so you don’t have to overthink it, and its not good to dance around thiings, so one day when you feel like the timing is right than just ask him “what are we” or “what exactly do you want”.
It’s ok to ask.. we are big boys and can take a direct question.. you can say exactly what you are feeling and voice your concerns.. if you are ready to delete whatever dating up then good on you. Say that you are ready and ask where he is.. now be rdy he might not be looking for what you are.. a few weeks surely is enough to gauge what the endgame is for him.. many ppl use dating apps to date not to find and commitment and all that.. it’s ok if ppl do. You be yourself and if he is not the one move on.. there are 4 billion other guys
You just honestly need to build up the courage and ask. It’s for the best. Just place it well into a conversation where it falls naturally.
I would just ask “So… Do you want to be my boyfriend?” then if he says “yes” you can be like “Cool, so… we’re not going to be seeing other people from now on?” and he’ll probably just say “yeah” and you can be done with it.
5 weeks? It’s too early. Come to an agreement about being exclusive but didn’t bring up the relationship labeling. Is the Label important to you so you can tell others? That in itself says volumes.
4-6 months is the time when most men are comfortable making a decision.
“Hey, what are we? Where is this going?” … seems pretty simple. A lot easier than asking a bunch of randos on reddit . . ..
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So both of you Hage dating apps installed. As long as neither use them then who cares. As a guy he probably forgot it’s there.
5 weeks is nothing…
why are you asking him? why are you not taking any responsibility here?
You sound super anxious. Why are you so eager to start something? If it’s worth it you should have no worries because itd feel mutually “organic”, if it’s not it’s not worth your thought pinball.
If someone asks me that question at 5 weeks, we are nothing. I don’t even consider being exclusive until at least 6 months. Getting this question at 5 weeks tells me she is impatient and needy. That’s a red flag for which I end whatever we did have.
Be open and honest. It’s the quickest way to skip the bullshit.