How do you know when you’re ready to move in with your partner?

24 comments

1. For me, they spent more time at my house than theirs. Seemed pointless running two houses.

2. If you get on with them and you can see things being fine 2 years from now, just do it.

   If it works, great. If not, tears and look for a new place.

3. For me it just kind of happened.

   I just realised I was spending more time at his than mine and most of my stuff was there. I was only going back to mine once or twice a week just to pick up stuff. We questioned why we were paying two sets of rent when we could just pay for his and save a lot of money.

   Covid had also hit and for a time I wondered if we would not be able to see each other due to households not being able to mix so I think that was part of it too.

   We had been together for about two and a half years.

4. Six months after you do it

5. As a gay man who has lived on his own since 2008 and despite being in other relationships since then, I never ended up living with my then partner. So I just didn’t think I would be able to live with someone. Enter my current partner, we met in early July, he stayed over a couple of weekends and some days in the week. I made the suggestion of having a trial week when we live together at my place, that was the beginning of August, we have only spent 2 nights apart since then and we both hated both of them. He is giving notice for his current flat at the end of this month.

   Turns out me living with the right guy is very easy.

6. When you’ve feel like you’ve completed sex, because when you live together you can have sex all of the time so you never bother anymore.

7. It’s the ultimate test really. I’ve sort of known before I’ve moved in with friends in the past, and my now wife.

   You just have a feeling that things will generally ‘click’.

   Being able to take a dump at their place and boast about it is always a great indicator imo.

8. In my experience you only know you’re ready after you’ve moved in. As you can foresee, this can lead to problems 😅

9. When your mum kicks you out and you have no where else to go

10. If you want to do it then you’re ready to do it. If it doesn’t work out, at least you gave it a go.

11. When she doesn’t hide her farts and wears your old army and rugby t shirts to the gym.

12. If you can comfortably be in the same place without actively doing something together. Nobody can devote themselves to their partner 100% of the time, everybody needs some time to themselves.

    Source: my mum’s advice to me.

13. When living apart is too much of a hassle and expensive because you end up at one house for most of the week and most of your stuff is there anyway. Having said that…if you can afford it, try and keep the other house going just in case you need some space.

14. Typically, you spend every night or so together and feel more ‘right’ together than apart, and it becomes more hassle to have stuff in two places.

    I fully agree with the answer of /u/whoops53 – there are two considerations- one is emotional and one is practical. Howmuch stuff do you each have? Where are you going to put it? Do you have other family members’ places around (typically parents hahaha) where surplus stuff can be stored (or still stored- adult children often retain a room in the family home where they grew up)

15. Honestly it depends. We moved in together after a year because we were semi long distance and both lived at home and wanted to move on with our lives. It’s been 7 months and we’re completely happy.

    I have to say, we had the kind of relationship where we don’t argue and if we do have issues, we talk them through and sort them out. We’ve only ever really argued over building ikea furniture! It’s the only time he’s ever stormed out of the house haha!

    Safe to say, if you have a healthy non toxic relationship and absolutely ZERO doubts about the person, then do it. If you’re renting, make sure you have a break clause just in case!

16. If you are having to ask the worlds supply of rando’s I wouldn’t or at least make sure have a fall back, you sound as if you are hoping none of the replies will fit you exactly so it won’t happen. For reference most (in my experience) couples just go for it and work out wrinkles as they go, if it doesn’t work at least try to be grown up and friends after

17. Try it for a couple of weeks first.

18. Different for everyone. But from experience (particularly amongst my mates) don’t move in, in year 1.

19. Don’t over-think it.
    Some things in life are just what humans do. Cohabiting is one of the things most people do.
    If you are in a healthy relationship with someone and can’t see a scenario where you won’t be with them, then the decision on when to cohabit just comes down to practical matters (other commitments).
    Not saying you are doing this, but I would personally find it a red flag if my partner displayed unjustified commitment issues.

20. Then they get a dog.

    Seriously this happened to me. My mrs would stay Fri-Mon, Then one friday, I picked her up, and went to collect 2 border collies…. She never left after that weekend. That was 14 years ago.

21. I just kind of knew, more because she had bank statements in her name at my address, but she moves quick my wife…

    Dating for 2 weeks

    Living together since

22. Started dating my now-husband, I was renting a one bed flat and he was in a house share closer to both of our offices. I got made redundant about 2 weeks after we started seeing each other, and was basically just using his room as a base location from which to look for a new job, and spending maybe 5-6 nights a week with him.

    We decided that it was a waste of money to pay for two places when we were spending almost all of our time together anyway, and if we moved in together it would take the financial pressure off me while I was out of work so that I could make sure I took the time to find something I wanted rather than just the first thing that came along. Plus, he hated living with 5 other people, so he moved in to my flat with me. We’d been together about 3 months by the time he moved in. Now been together 11 years, married 6, with a 3 year old and another on the way

    So it basically started off being a very practical thing, but it wouldn’t have happened if we weren’t 100% comfortable with each other already

23. When you look in your purse, and there’s only shrapnel. all the best.

24. Took about 3 months for me and the missus. Best decision ever, she amazing.