I’m becoming a bad person, i treat others like shit and i try to stay away from everyone. People now see me like a rude and angry person but i’m not been always like this, i remember being a shy and nice boy with everyone, always caring for others and try to be liked from others. Now it’s all the way around, people made me change a lot, i can’t treat my friends well, i can’t express my feelings to other and if someone try to talk about serious stuff with me i make fun of them. Deep down i want to talk to people about how i feel, about my loneliness and all the things i’ve been through but… i can’t be vulnerable because i can’t trust anyone no more after been betrayed so many times, i don’t know who i should be, if myself, or this rude and strong personality that i built up.
2 comments
You seem to be doing to your friends exactly what you say others did to you.
Look, you have to accept that what you’re doing, how you’re behaving in relation to people close to you, wasn’t something that someone else that made you do, you’re not like this because someone turned you into this.
It’s just you. You did it, and it’s in your hands to stop doing it, you’re using past betrayals as an excuse to hurt others, because at some point you decided you had enough and that if you’re going to suffer then you’ll make others suffer with you.
But in the end the only way forward is to accept that it’s just you, and you have to accept you have these impulses and that you need to learn how to control them or direct them so they don’t hurt people that care for you.
A good start is making a mental note each time you have this feeling, and later in the day when you have some time to yourself try to unpack why did you feel the need to hurt that person.
Omg did I write this wow u hit the letter on the head with me. The world changes you. Always show kindness, even in the blackest of nights, but right now you’re going to the Zak same thing I am you’ve been hurt even lie to you been robbed you don’t feel like there’s literally anybody you can trust you back into a corner you’re snapping at people I’m doing the exact same thing. As for me I’m staying away from people right now as much as I can I don’t trust nobody I don’t depend on anybody everything right now is 100% me. and that’s how I’m coping with it. But the snapping at people that’s just stress and anxiety.