To expand on the title, my girlfriend has been feeling significantly depressed recently after a change in living conditions, and **she usually comes to me** for emotional support, advice, or just to help herself cheer up a bit during the lighter issues.
**It’s not uncommon for her to become kind of distant during harder times** due to exhaustion and whatnot, but **this time she’s been especially distant**, almost not talking to me at all while I’ve been regularly sending her messages and the like to let her know I’m here for her. After a couple days of near radio silence, **I ask if she’s okay, wants to talk about anything, or if there’s something I should be concerned about** (when my ex did this same thing it was because she wanted to end the relationship and didn’t know how to break it to me, so I’ve got some anxiety around this behavior). She told me there wasn’t but **she might continue to be silent for the next while because she has to work through something**, and I asked if she wanted me to keep sending messages to let her know I’m still thinking about her, and **she asked that I stop talking to her entirely** until she decides to come back.
**I have no clue what she’s upset about or why she wants me to give her complete space** while she deals with it, but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t make me worried. This conversation took place a couple days ago and I’ve been respecting her wishes, but I literally haven’t stopped thinking about her because I’m very concerned for her well-being as well as the health of our relationship. I think it’s worth adding that **she’s the type to not want to burden others with her problems**, and despite my reassurance – I make an effort not to push her into talking to me when she doesn’t want to, I just reassure her that she can – she usually won’t tell me what’s wrong and results to distancing herself.
I fully intend to marry this girl someday, this is something we’ve discussed before, but after this I’ve decided that I won’t marry her until she works through this problem (I view it as a problem at least, I was raised to believe that partners are meant to be supports for each other during their dark times) and she lets me remain a part of her life when it’s at its worst.
**Basically my question is**, is this a bad sign for our relationship? I’ve made an effort to not push her to do things that she’s not comfortable with, but is something this extreme something I should put my foot down with? How can I still support her when she adamantly refuses support at during low points?
**At the moment I’m thinking** that when/if she comes back I will talk to her about this, **saying that I’m very uncomfortable with her taking that course of action and I really want to come to a compromise**, because – and maybe this is only my opinion – I find it very unfair of her to eject me from her life entirely when she’s dealing with something rough, especially when she wants to play a support role in my life. Not to mention, **I have a hard time believing this issue has nothing to do with me when she claims to need me absent to resolve it**.
**I am open to the idea that I’m perceiving all this wrong** and would love to hear other opinions and courses of actions that I should consider.
TL;DR My girlfriend has asked that I stop communicating with her entirely while she works through some issues, and I’m not sure if this is a bad sign for our relationship.