This is mostly just a rant. I’ve been in a wonderful relationship for about 2 years now. I couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend, he does a lot for me. I see myself with him forever.
In the last few months or so though, I have been feeling quite crazy for the state our apt is in. It’s always been messy with him around but it seems to be getting worse.
It’s like pulling teeth to get him to clean up after himself let alone our home in general.
I also work at a hospital all week while boyfriend works from home. 99% of the time that I come home, the house is an absolute mess. I’ll ask him how his day was and he’ll happily tell me he took a long nap and played his playstation. He also gets off work 3.5 hours before I come home.
After trying to be calm about it for months, if there’s a mess when I walk in the door now I immediately become a bitch and we start fighting. That isn’t who I am or who I want to be. Especially if I’ve had a rough day at work the last thing I want to do is clean and I’d rather spend time with him than clean all night. I’ve told him what makes me the most anxious which is the living room having clutter (mostly his old food and his clothes on the floor) and to just worry about that. Nothings changed.
Our roommate moved out so he turned their room into an office space but now it’s just an avalanche of clothes that keeps piling up to the point you cant even open the door. I’ve helped him with a clothes avalanche before and I don’t want to do it again. It also makes me sad because we have a small place that i spent a lot of time making it look nice when it was just me and now it’s not even worth trying to make it look nice anymore. Most of my free time is spent cleaning even though I’m already exhausted from work. Anyone else dealing with this?
1 comment
In the first place really wish you luck.
In the second it’s something you kinda need to argue about to make him understand. You’re a couple, you’re making decisions together if it doesn’t work out – it doesn’t work out. He needs to understand he’s not alone there and if he doesn’t wanna be it needs to change. It’s not your job to be his mother and he’s not a kid anymore to need someone to pick his trash. It’s on him to change, make him realize that and don’t overwork yourself, when he doesn’t give a fuck about it.