How Do You First Talk To A Tinder Match When You Hate Small Talk?

5 comments

1. So have a conversation with a point. Most women are bored with smalltalk anyways.

2. Simple, ask her what she can tell you about herself and then go with it.

3. Ask other questions then

4. So don’t have “small talk”?

5. I really don’t like small talk too, and I’m also super bad at it, but I also get it. I have to understand that making conversation with a complete stranger is gonna be awkward at first, the “what do you study,” and “what are your hobbies” questions are gonna come up inevitably. You’ll even find yourself asking these redundant questions too. But it should come to a point where it’s engaging for the both of you so that you aren’t resorting to just small-talk questions to keep the conversations going, because that would eventually die out. How I do this is create inside jokes or play-flirt, sort of like teasing. It breaks down the walls and allows for comfortability, if you know what I mean. Then if they catch your vibe, then bingo! If not, then maybe they aren’t someone you should be seeing right now. I say right now because making new conversations with countless of people on an app can be so redundant that even after awhile it’s just tiring. I say give people the benefit of the doubt that some of these people are jaded after having the same conversations and questions over and over, and give them a fair chance to reveal themselves is how I approach online dating.

   Off-topic, but I used to never get why pick-up lines worked. They seemed awfully cheesy and cringe to me… until I started going on apps. It‘a not even the jokes themselves that I’m appealed by. It’s that it’s different. Especially when a majority of conversation start with the basic, “what’s your favourite colour” and such questions, it just makes the person stand out more. And shows that you are willing to put yourself out there, even if it is cheesy and cringe. Is that just me?