Hello everyone,
I (19m) met a girl (18f) who is mainly attracted to other girls and I need your help.
So I met this girl around 4 months ago through a mutual friend at a pool party, and we found that we have a lot of things in common, and ever since we started talking almost daily. we became close friends and slowly I began to develop emotions toward her. she became a part of my day, and it’s hurting me not to tell her but I know that she would reject me because she made it clear that she’s attracted to females. and even if she was attracted to males I don’t think she would see me more than a close friend.
I don’t want to confess to her because she is truly a friend I would love to keep in my life, but this feeling is killing me and I don’t know what to do about it. she is my first crush so these emotions are all new to me, I just want these feelings to disappear so I don’t ruin what to ruin our friendship, please advise me.
BTW English is not my mother language so please forgive any grammar/spelling mistakes.
Thank you for your time and I appreciate every response.
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tl;dr: The girl I like is attracted to females and I don’t want to ruin our friendship by confessing to her.
2 comments
Find a new hobby or re-engage one that you’ve neglected. Spend more time with other people. You don’t have to stop spending time with her, just diversify your social life. Do stuff that doesn’t involve thinking about her. Time and space are the ultimate cure for unrequited crushes.
If you find yourself dwelling on the feelings that you want to share with her, write them down and then burn the paper or delete the file. Get those feelings out without communicating them.
There are only two healthy ways to deal with crushes: ask the person out and see what happens, or you distance yourself from the person and let the crush pass. Those are the only two options that wont left you feeling feeling like shit and drag the hurt on for way too long. Its up to you to decide which of these two options is more attractive to you. But you cant expect to maintain the same level of friendship and closeness and just magicly get rid of your feelings somehow. That doesnt work.