Okay, I’m gonna keep this rather short. My(19F) boyfriend(20M) and I have been together almost a year now, and our sex life is good. But there is just one little thing that bothers me. He won’t go down on me. He says he “likes the idea” but he just can’t because he thinks it..smells weird..? I’ve never thought much of my own smell, and while it’s peculiar I don’t think it’s bad. I’ve never thought much of his either and have no real trouble going down on him. Like, sure, it may not be a *nice* smell, but I somehow don’t care and find it unusually easy to disregard because I want to please him. But he just..can’t? And that sort of makes me lose motivation to go down on him, too. Because I’d like reciprocation. He’s respectful of this, but I’d love for us to find s way to both go down on each other.
So, my question is, has anyone else faced this issue? And did you find any kind of solution? I’ve been considering flavored lube, although it isn’t the taste that’s the issue, he says. But maybe it smells good, too? If anyone has any tips or ideas, please leave a comment! All advice is welcome <3
5 comments
You don’t need any lube or flavored products. He just need to get comfortable with it. Some guys love it, other don’t care for it as much. Like girls who don’t like giving head lol
How experienced are you both? Has he gone down on anyone before? I love going down on my girlfriend, and while she’s usually very clean and showers before sex there have been times where it was just spontaneous and I didn’t mind at all. Have you tried right after a shower?
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You can’t define what other people find attractive or unattractive, but it’s also not an aspect that is fixed over time. It’s possible that it’s just not something he’s learned to appreciate yet, but it’s also possible that’s it’s a hang up he’ll never move past. I can say as a man in my 50s that I find things attractive now that I did not when I was younger.
I had an early fascination with going down on women but it was more visual and the first time I did the smell and taste was new and different and not “sexy” they way they are now. It wasn’t a turn off – it just wasn’t something I had any association with and was new. I didn’t have any instinctual connection or fascination to it the same way I did the visuals…. but it became part of the package and part of the excitement with exposure.
So I would agree with the suggestion to give it a try right after a shower, maybe even have it a mutual shower where you soap up each others’ naughty bits. Even freshly washed there’s going to be a hint of smell, more so if you have pubes – but that’s mostly from moisture and if you let it dry out a touch it should be fine unless it’s just a hang up he has.
Seeing the effect that it has had on my partners won me over and made me enjoy it and love it and appreciate and want it. I wouldn’t fake it, but if you enjoy it show it and that will go a long way in winning someone over.