I (21M) have been talking to this girl (21F) for almost two months now. We met through mutual friends. It’s been going great, I see her almost every single day, every time I go over I usually spend the night. I tried asking her a couple of weeks ago if she thought this could be more serious(over text), and she said she wanted to talk about it in person (I went over and we never talked about it, which I should of brought it up). I asked her a week later if we can talk about it and it seems she’s avoiding the question/conversation. It’s been two weeks since I asked her that and there’s a part of me if I actually have the conversation she’s going to tell me something I wont want to hear (rejection lol). I know right now she’s dealing with some personal/family issues. Should I tell her now rather than later? Or should I wait a little bit longer or don’t even bring it up?
I really like her a lot I do want to be something more serious with her.
4 comments
What do you want to tell her? That you love her?
Or are you asking for exclusivity, or planning to propose marriage?
TBH this will go a lot better if she brings it up, and asks you for more. Which she may never do.
Your best course of action here is to wait and see, while shedding your expectations as much as possible. She obviously doesn’t want that with you right now, and she may never. Assume this will be a fwb thing that ends when she gets a boyfriend, who is not you, and continue under that frame. Maybe later she’ll change, but it needs to come from her unprompted, to be worth anything.
Be honest and put it ti her simple.
Example” *Hey, I know I keep bringing the talk up and I can see it makes you uncomfortable. I get it, you have a lot going on. Well just let me put it like this.*
*I like you. But I dont wanna rush in and bulldoze. So when you feel you’re at a good place and ready, you bring it up ye?*
Then just drop it and snuggle that girl in the sofa and enjoy your day.
And be ready that it may never be, and if you can’t accept that. Leave and dont look back, you’ve given it your shot.
It sounds like she’s not interested and it sounds like you haven’t even gone on a date with her yet either. I wouldn’t confess feelings to her, either just ask her on a date (make sure you make it clear it’s a date) or move on to someone else. She knows you’re into her and it sounds like she’s trying to avoid discussing the fact you’re into her, which means she’s probably not interested. But it wouldn’t be wrong to ask her on a date, as long as you accept whatever her response is.