I (29F) currently married to (30M), we have 9yrs together, 2 kids. Throughout our relationship there was many things I didn’t like, I would talk about it, he’d promise to change then revert back to his old self. We are now separated but not divorced and still living together. I met a (33M) at work, we instantly connected! Now I feel a reason to move out and move on with my life… However, my ex (30M) wants to work things out and I’m afraid of hurting my kids, separating our family etc. I don’t know what to do… Do I stay or go?
4 comments
That’s a very difficult decision you are taking.
Take the time to weight everything out. Maybe that guy at work isn’t exactly ready for family life with two step children ? Maybe your husband says he has changed but yet hasn’t…
Take the time to know which outcome will make you the most happy. Your kids will be happy if you’re fulfilled.
I assume the kids go with you?
Too vague, what are the things he promised to change? Big things, like cheating, alcohol or drug abuse? Financial ruin, physical abuse of you or children? Or small things? That would make a difference to me if I had a family. Small things, worth working out, large things, not at all.
Dude, don’t go from one relationship to the next in an instant especially when you have kids. I mean your life your actions, but if you want to get a divorce from this guy set a good example of how to do it, rather than having a house and friendship with your ex full of turmoil and resentment from you to your ex where you’ll most likely end up arguing andll hurt your kids. Advice? Move out by yourself with your kids (shared custody shit), get divorced take 5-6 months by yourself to heal and if this other guys around then be with him. If he’s not he wasn’t the one. You’re just gonna drag all the issues from the past relationship into the new one. And if this new one doesn’t work out will you really feel happy with yourself? Idk man set a good example and make sure whatever you do, keep both you and your ex in a healthy friendship of raising the kids. Though the post is too vague so idk every detail of the situation.