Yk I’ve always wondered whether making friends was something I had to genuinely put effort in. Like literally learning how carry conversation or bring up topics and whatnot. I usually have a hard time with this and think “ I must be boring the sh!t out of them and that’s why I don’t have many friends”. But then I think about real friends I’ve had, which isn’t many, but nonetheless real connection. The conversation, the vibe, the effort..it’s all so….EASY and comfortable. Funny thing is I don’t even have that much in common with my genuine friends but our convo just flows and I’m not thinking about whats gonna come my mouth next or whether I’m showing that I’m engaged or some talking strategy. So I guess I’m asking what do u guys think. Does making a good friend have to do with consistent effort to fight social anxiety throughout an initial getting to know eachother talking phase or do u just wait to find someone and just…’click’ ?
2 comments
this is such an interesting question
i think some people struggle with confidence and feeling comfortable around others tho so learning those skills helps them to build relationships and connections with other people… like someone that was nervous to talk to someone but gained the courage to just do it, they could still have a genuine relationship with that person and get to that comfortable point eventually. sometimes u guys instantly vibe and other times it takes getting to know one another and getting past the initial awkward phase