Hey guys! Been lurking for a long time and try to contribute as much as I can. Hope this is ok with the mods.
I’ve been dating for a year now, after divorce, and honestly just feel like I’m having a tough go. It’s been hard to even get a good conversation going with most people, and the actual dates are pretty few and far between. I probably match with someone once a week, but it rarely progresses past one or two messages, even though I try hard to comment on things in their profile and ask better questions than “how’s it going?” I’m wondering if there’s something in my online presence that is turning people off. Would love some eyeballs on it!
[https://imgur.com/a/KMcQzeB](https://imgur.com/a/KMcQzeB)
Thank you so much in advance.
EDIT: Forgot to mention the audio prompt and video. Best dad joke is: “What’s do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?” The Oscar-winning video is me directing an actor by awkwardly pantomiming some pole dancing haha.
9 comments
Get rid of the picture with the hat. Also, I don’t know anything about you from your profile. The only thing I see about you is that you’re looking for someone with a growth mindset and you’re on you’re own journey. That’s great, but so is everyone else lol. I don’t think that really adds anything to your profile. Once you start talking to someone, you can tell pretty quickly if they have a positive outlook or not.
Looks great! Honestly, I just want to know the punchline to your dad joke now.
I’d swipe in a heartbeat but I’m childfree. Friend swipe?
dang why are there not nice single dads in my area who don’t get enough attention?? I swear they’re always the ones here that Hinge warns me I better hand a rose to because they’re popular
the two-handed selfie… idk how I feel about that. good photo of your face but awkward angle for a guy.
you might be getting fewer people matching because you don’t like to chat? I’m not sure about this. I personally swipe left on people who say they want to meet up immediately bc I know it doesn’t work for me, but you’ve given a nice middle ground by being open to a phone chat.
not that it would dissuade anyone from swiping but I found the “quarter life crisis” confusing – since it’s just you with a hat – and presumably it’s not an old photo? Or is it? (if it’s 25 years old – quarter of your life if you’re really healthy?)
I feel like the first prompt and the third prompt are a bit similar and the third one is also a bit vague. You’re on a journey and would love to find someone who’s also on a journey? I would read this and not feel any closer to understanding who you are or what a relationship with you would look like. I don’t know if you’re looking for someone to go outside a lot (my impression from all the photos), or more of a Netflix guy, or ?
last photo stance is a bit odd
Honestly it’s not bad so I’m not sure what the huge problem is, might just be demographics
I really like your profile and would message you. Some people, depending on your area, might be intimated by your progressive outlook on life. I didn’t appreciate the journey on progressing myself until I hit 37 (38F).
Would swipe right in a heartbeat. 🙂
B&W photo closer to the top, if not the opening image, i like the campfood image but it doesnt show me enough of your face? i like the selfie image more than the one with the cap so swap positions on those. cap should go at the end. i think you could add another selfie, i know ppl poo poo on selfies but the match i like the most right now is like 80% selfies on his profile.
(eta: i swipe pretty quickly when on the app, if that campfood photo is the first photo, you are likely being passed up bc it doesnt really create a curiosity about you to explore the rest of your profile)
i dont really get a sense of what youre looking for btw, not in a prompt or in one of the fields, probably should fill that out
growth mindset plus spirituality.. idk something about that seems off, could you expand on what you mean here?
i also kind of think thats a waste of a prompt, you really cant filter for that type of internal work just because someone says they do it, it kind of reminds me of saying youre empathetic.. its the stuff you kind of have to observe
i think theres a prompt that could be better used to either describe you better or what youre looking in a partner other than being pushed and ambitious
You’re very good-looking and I think you have one of the better than average profiles I’ve seen in that it looks like you took great care to choose a variety of photos and you clearly put time into the prompts. It’s a dealbreaker for me to date a man with kids but if it wasn’t I’d swipe right. So I’m going to be very nitpicky.
First, I think the black and white photo is the best photo of you. The top photo you’re in profile only. It’s a good candid photo, I think this one’s down to personal preference.
The next thing that came to mind is that I wouldn’t really know what to comment on in your prompts except maybe the simple pleasures. I think it’s important to mention you have two kids but the part about setting up a date sooner rather than later seems superfluous. Aren’t we all looking to do that?
I noticed you don’t have filled in what your dating goals are. Why is that? The vibe I get from your profile is you’re looking for a LTR. If that’s true, why not name that?
Biggest question I have from your profile that is unanswered is… if I were to go on a date with you, what would that be like? Your profile makes you sound like a serious guy, no problem with that (unless that’s not how you see yourself). What do you do for fun?
31f I find hinge slow too so I don’t think its just a problem you are having. I would swipe on you I liked your profile. The only photo I would replace is the mirror one. Maybe add a prompt with a hobby to get more engagement. I have bouldering on mine and guys always comment on that and ask to go with me/help me learn 🙂
I like your photos, but the selfie should be swapped out for something else. I think the hat photo or black-and-white photo should be first. But overall, I think you’re solid with your pictures (as I’d expect a cinematographer to be).
But your prompts are just a little serious. The growth prompt is serious; the kids prompt is serious; and the first one is pretty standard. I have found that being playful, funny, or even a bit eccentric can help you stand out, so give the ladies a prompt to interact with and/or consider adding one of the new polls to let them connect on something, even if it is frivolous. Your profile doesn’t have to be as serious as you think. So try out some different things and don’t be afraid to continually tweak it.