I am crushing on someone i met a couple weeks back, we were both introduced to each other when my fiance and i took a break (1 week) from each other. We have issues, basically that he wants to live in the US and me here. So we’ve been putting off our wedding bc of this. Until we can decide where to settle.
The other guy has tried talking to me but I would distance myself or reply late to his messages because I do respect my fiance. But i cant stop thinking that i could have an easier and more convenient relationship w this other guy since we have the same upbringing and goals.
He’s viewed my stories (im on vacation right now) but hasnt messaged since I think ive been really unresponsive to his messages.
Help… thoughts?
6 comments
You should have figured things out with your fiancée first before you committed yourself into an emotional affair. At this point I think you’re in too deep and should just cut things off now, you clearly already want the alternative relationship more.
Sounds like your current relationship isn’t what you want.
You don’t know this guy at all, all these thoughts about an easy convenient relationship are daydreams, you don’t even know if he wants a relationship – you have only just met.
I would back off completely from this guy, cut all contact. You have feelings so shouldn’t even BE indulging them by messaging with him.
Sort out your relationship with your fiancé separately. Never base relationship decisions on anyone else – that nearly always goes badly. Just decide what you and your fiancé want to do in your relationship based on that – you can’t do this clearly if you are emotionally being caught up with someone else.
Ask yourself whether you want to be in your current relationship. Don’t leave for another guy, you don’t know his true intentions and you’ll never know unless you cheat on your partner (assuming you’re not gonna do this)
Focus on whether you can fix your relationship, if you can then great! If you can’t then leave and then start looking at other prospective partner’s
The grass is always greener…except when it’s not
If you were dating someone fairly new or was a boyfriend then ok this new guy is convenient and maybe you dont want the hassle of long distance etc
But this is your fiance we are talking about, you know the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with, right ? For better or worse ? The guy you plan the rest of your life with ? Did.you discuss moving away ?
Not to mention you have been with your fiance for quite some time (you dont mention how long you have known your fiance) and some new guy comes along that you hardly know and you debating between the two ?
It makes me wonder: a) just how committed you are to your fiance ? b) maybe your finacd is not the guy for you.?
I might forget about this new guy for now and think about your commitment to your fiance and perhaps discuss moving to the US.
If I was your fiancé and I found this out, I would call of the wedding and leave your ass immediately, I am no woman’s side dish. I am the steak!
Tell your fiancé the truth, so he can dodge the bullet.