On monday i found out my ex girlfriend (21) cheated on me (25) in beginning of our relationship. She cheated me once with my close friend who she met by me. I was with her about 6 months.
We talked about this and she seems nearly as broken as i am about this. We decided to break up. Few days after i was thinking about giving her another chance but she rejected it for same reasons i pointed her when i left her. Reasons were that trust will most likely never recover, and anything wouldn’t be the same and its easier to let go. I also think at this point theres no way to get back together and continue after this.
Day after she sent me message where she did apologize this, telling me how good i was for her and how this is the baddest thing happened to her that she lost me and she hopes she would be able to forgive herself at some point in her life. I calld her and we talkd about this and still decided to just move on without hate. She told me she loves me and i told her i love her, but still only option is to move on. I didint hear about her after till this morning.
She texted me how i am and how do i feel. What should i do? I havent answered yet. I know she has been out this weekend getting drunk and maybe this hits her now bad when shes alone.
Tldr; my ex gf who cheated on me texted me how am i doing few days after break up. What should i do?
3 comments
When I was younger, my ex cheated on me multiple times, and I tried to force things to work out.
As I see it, there are only two possible outcomes when your partner cheats on you: You break up, stop talking to them, and move on with your life. Or you try to make things work and you develop severe trust issues and anxiety and self-esteem problems from knowing you didn’t stand up for your own needs and showed your partner that cheating is acceptable. You start resenting your partner for doing this to you. Things get worse and messier as your lives remain intertwined, and it makes you get even more trapped in this cycle of abuse. And you eventually break up anyway, but now you’re much worse off than you would’ve been if you’d just ended things the first time.
So… you’re making the right choice by breaking up with her.
Talking with her right now is only going to allow her to be manipulative and threaten the firmness of your resolution in your decision to leave. It does no good for you, and you need to look out for yourself over someone who completely fucked you over (with a close friend of yours!!! wtf). You may want to be amicable with her, but she lied by omission to you every day, and that is enough justification to know that she is not considerate of you enough to be in your life. Talking to her further just gives her chances to get inside of your head, and she’s shown that she doesn’t care about how she influences your mind. She may be regretful, but that’s her lesson to learn. She fucked around and now she’s gotta find out, that’s tough for her but it’s her problem to deal with on her own. You don’t have to be her emotional support.
You’ve done the best possible thing for your own sanity, so please try to be proud of yourself for choosing to do the tough thing and end the relationship, and let this pride help you remain strong in that decision, and do the things that will help you the most to be able to move forward productively.
I’m just not understanding what u’re saying. I think u need to proof read before posting.
I can’t understand why do u believe her now after she was busted. When she smashed ur best bud she didn’t come and confess and come clean so why believe her now she lied, lied by omission. So why accept that she has regrets, go NC , DON’T answer nothing from her. She is where she needs to be ,on the streets.