My husband and I have been together a few years and finally decided we want to have a baby. We don’t have huge sex drives and maybe had sex about once a week before. Doctor told us to have sex as many days as possible between day 10 and 20 of my cycle. I just find that feeling obligated to have sex on those specific days of the month kills my sex drive. Usually we only manage to do it 3-4 days during that week and then take some time off. How do other couples handle this? It’s so weird after you go through so many years trying to not make a baby!
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My wife and I had the same issue. We decided to not try anymore and just have fun. She got pregnant about 6 months after that decision. Hope this helps
This could be a really good opportunity to build some emotional intimacy with your husband.
* First: figure out what makes each other’s libidos tick. Like, the nitty gritty. Do either of you need physical foreplay? Emotional foreplay? A feeling of closeness? Being wanted? The list goes on. You two might even find things you’re into that you didn’t think you would be.
* Another option is making a game out of it. Something lighthearted like a dartboard with various sexual positions (game is more fun if you’re both *terrible* at darts.)
* Another idea may be to just have (friendly) competition. Who can orgasm last, who can last the longest before needing a break. How many rounds you can go before one of you taps out.
Essentially, it boils down to what will make “scheduled” sex a worthwhile experience for the both of you. Whether it’s letting loose, learning something about each other, whatever works for you two.
Scheduled sex is about as romantic as trying to catch a flight on time. Surely you can be more creative than that. Making baby I s full of surprises. Conception happens in its own good time and a relaxed intimate time of sexual intercourse is apt to be more effective anyway. Then the miracle kind of sneaks up on you. There is no miracle that happens on a fixed time or schedule.
Turkey baster! /s
Nah seriously though, if it’s not fun any more, it’s not worth doing. You risk turning sex from something you both enjoy in to something you resent/see as a chore. And that’s not easy to come back from.
Do what you FEEL like doing, stick with it, and it WILL happen, just may be a little longer than if you did it every damn day.
But the quality of life / not fucking your sexlife up, is probably worth the extra wait!
We did it every other day or so, it was super romantic. 😀
From my experience with having 2 kids, it was more important to have sex on the exact day of the ovulation, than to do it everyday. If you don’t feel the ovulation (my wife feels extra horny on that day) you can use ovulation tests to check the exact day.
Go online and buy ovulation tests in bulk, like a 30 pack. It’s $15-$20. She test daily, if there’s a line, go at it like bunnies. Doing it too often will actually not increase odds, you only produce so much sperm so fast.