Hello everyone, I’m in a bit of a situation here.
I 24F, was using my BF phone (with his knowledge) cause mine was dead. I was on Instagram and out of curiosity wanted to see who he chats with. (I know it’s still breaching his privacy but I didn’t go snooping out of mistrust).
So my BF has a female friend that I know of and have met and we are also friends (not super close tho).
When I saw her name I kinda realized that my BF doesn’t really speak of her unless she coming to visit. So I clicked on their convos.
Their messages were normal friendship texts and updating each other on their lives kind of convos and venting a bit ( idk of what cause I didn’t listen to the voice messages)
It’s worth noting that she has a BF
So back to the texts, one made me feel uncomfortable and weirded me out.
In one convo they were just checking up on each other, and he was telling her that he has to go to work or smth and she replied with equivalent of “ok babe” in our mother language, and its so weird to say it to a friend.
So I confused, just closed his phone and went to bed. It’s so weird cause I with all my heart don’t think he’ll every cheat on me cause we have an amazing relationship and he’s super in love with me.
But I can’t keep this information inside it feels like it’s eating me alive and I don’t know what to do!
I didn’t want to confront him and having him be upset about the privacy breaching and it causing trust issues between us, but at the same time I feel like he owns his partner an explanation for a weird text like that ??? Where do I stand here and in what possible way can I talk to him about this ???
3 comments
“Hey, yesterday when I used your phone, I saw this weird message from Name where she said Message and it made me uncomfortable.”
Just start the convo.
Don’t start the conversation until you have all of the information you need. Maybe do some more snooping and see if it’s anything more before saying something.
To be honest, if you don’t think he’s doing anything otherwise as a female best friend I call my guy friends and girl friends honey, hun, babe, and sugar a lot. So maybe that’s how she is. Maybe it doesn’t come from a malicious place. If the rest of the messages were normal, I wouldn’t bug out about it. Yes you breached his privacy. Yes thats a major issue. If you think you’d do it again or have the urge to you need to bring it up. Say “Hey, I let my curiosity get the best of me when I had your phone yesterday. I’m really sorry I invaded your privacy. I quickly realized I was wrong. But I felt guilty and wanted to bring it up.” Insert text here if you think it’s a big deal. Otherwise, If you genuinely don’t think you’d do it again, go through his phone, computer, whatever, don’t bring it up. Leave sleeping dogs to lie you know.