I (30M) just went on my first date in about 3 years. We were given each others numbers by someone we know mutually. She texted me first and after texting for a few days she said she wanted to meet. She was easy to talk to and seemed very kind and nonjudgmental but it’s hard to get a feel for someone without even hearing their voice and I had no idea what she looked like. Looks aren’t the most important thing and they weren’t important enough for me to even ask our mutual friend what she looked like but they are a thing. So turns out she’s absolutely gorgeous. She said I was taller than she expected and I said she was really pretty so not a bad start. We talked for 2 and a half hours and I did my best to get to know her without just interviewing her and talking about myself too much and I think I did ok. At one point a random guy standing behind us had his hand on the back of her chair so I put my arm across the chair and pushed his hand away. I wonder if I should have done more I could tell it made her uncomfortable. We were both nervous and I wasn’t as funny and charismatic as I wanted to be but she’s smart and kind and beautiful and she offered to split the bill lol. Of course I said no. She said she had a lot of fun and she wanted to see me again. I walked her to her car and just a hug goodbye I didn’t go for a kiss. I’m excited to see her again but I’m not always good at reading people so I’m not sure how to act going forward. Maybe I’m overthinking this.
9 comments
You did not book a 2nd date towards the end of the first one?
When do you expect to be asking her out again?
You’re overthinking it. Send her a text tonight and if you haven’t already set it up, ask for a 2nd date. Just keep it short and sweet, “Hey I had a great time tonight and despite being pretty nervous, you put me at ease. I’d like to do it again sometime. Goodnight!”
You lucky lucky bastard. You owe your friends big time. You should send them something really nice.
Nah man you’re doing perfectly fine. The only thing as other suggested it’s to plan a second date(she even asked you what your plans were) without waiting too long. I read that you both don’t have that much time, so ask her when she’s available and secure the date.
Props to ya for accepting a “blind date” and non being judgemental.
Best of luck mate
Seems alright man.
Listen very fucking carefully:
1) Don’t get obsessed with her replying / not replying / taking time / saying something you’re not sure what it means etc. Just be positive. Keep yourself distracted with other things and don’t text her out of desperation.
2) Sounds like you did the natural thing and were very “NICE” on the first date. That’s great, but on the next date you need to stir up some emotions – have fun, flirt, tease, get a bit physical, don’t be afraid to have an opposing opinion or challenge her on something she said, make her laugh.
If you don’t do this stuff, there’s a good chance “there was no chemistry”. Just focus on having a good time YOURSELF. That’ll lead the way.
Definitely don’t overthink! You’re doing great and you guys seem into each other!
I would definitely plan the 2nd date asap though. Us girls get nervous and feel like the guy isn’t into us if he delays seeing us again. Usually we can’t even sleep thinking about guys after a first day- we’re already dying for the next one! (If we clicked that is, lol)
You’re overthinking
How old are you and her?
You are doing okay man, just be yourself and if she’s the one she’ll understand your action and shorten the distance with time ☺️